[KarlInOhio]

They say they found a butter-type knife in the school's band room and tried to return it, but the door had since been locked.

Fire the band director for leaving the deadly butter knife out where anyone could get it and go on a stabbing spree.

[OriginalChristian]

'Fire the band director for leaving the deadly butter knife out where anyone could get it and go on a stabbing spree.'

I propose a friendly amendment to your post:
'...could get it and go on a buttering spree.'