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Brace yourselves for the sympathetic, tear-jerking features on the morning "news" shows. |
The circus is back in town.
Posted on 04/30/2005 3:52:45 PM PDT by Pharmboy
ATLANTA (AP) - On the surface, Jennifer Wilbanks was a happy bride-to-be who showed no sign to friends or family that she wanted to call off her extravagant wedding. But underneath, as she would later tell police after running away to New Mexico, Wilbanks was scared and not sure she wanted to go through with her big day.
Marriage counselors say Wilbanks' actions are an extreme but understandable reaction to the stress of the wedding and the fear of disappointing others by backing out.
"Sometimes it's like being stuck in a river getting whisked over a waterfall," said Dr. Charles Raison, a psychiatrist and Emory University instructor who has counseled people about marital concerns. "The current is so strong, you can't fight it."
Shame about canceling a wedding at the last minute can lead to feelings of helplessness, counselors say.
"They've committed themselves out there in public, to their partner, their minister, their community, their friends while they've been perhaps nursing some ambivalence, mixed feelings and they feel isolated without being able to share it with anyone," said marriage counselor Andrew Gee. "It's like they've committed themselves to a course of action they're not comfortable with. That would be a nightmare to me."
Police say Wilbanks cut her hair to disguise her appearance so no one would recognize her during her bus trip west. She left her identification, credit cards and diamond ring behind. There was no note, and, for four days, no call home.
Then, late Friday, Wilbanks called her fiance and said she had been kidnapped - a story police later said was made up.
Raison said the size of the wedding - as many as 600 guests and 14 bridesmaids - may have overcome Wilbanks.
"Weddings are terrible stresses on people," he said. "They really try people's relationships, especially when they're one of these big productions."
Dr. Joan Miller, a marriage counselor in Marietta, Ga., said Wilbanks' case of second thoughts before marriage is common, though people don't always react to their situations the same way.
"She had everything planned and had an effective way to address the situation," Miller said. "It's hard to understand what's going on in her head because we're not in her situation."
Gee said some brides-to-be are open with their families about their jitters, while others keep the feelings bottled up.
Running away "seems a little extreme," Gee said. "But it feels extreme if you feel like you're about to break a commitment or you can't break a commitment. So, she resorted to extreme measures it seems."
Another Atlanta marriage counselor, Leslie L. Brenner, said the case suggests better communication is important between couples.
"It's a good wake-up call for everybody going through an engagement," Brenner said.
Yes--pre-nuptials are stressful--but 99.9% of brides to be don't fake abductions.
The spin begins.
Well I'm stressed out over my funeral. Don't know when it's going to be but I already know I don't want to go! So I'm bailing before it happens. Going to start a new life someplace else. Don't even TRY looking for me.
There is absolutely no excuse for this behavior! She could have left a note for her parents and her fiance.
We didn't know her until she ran away. Now, with the help of 24/7 cable TV we have to.
Shame.
Running away "seems a little extreme," Gee said. "But it feels extreme if you feel like you're about to break a commitment or you can't break a commitment. So, she resorted to extreme measures it seems."
She did NOT just run away; if it were merely that, she would have called home. She planned this for a while(including the fake abduction)...she bought the bus tickets a week prior to leaving.
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Brace yourselves for the sympathetic, tear-jerking features on the morning "news" shows. |
The circus is back in town.
Great idea, but aren't they already shacking? Still like your idea, but that might make it a tad more difficult.
Ironic, no? She's pathologically nervous about the impending wedding, bolts, and the net effect is that she'll get kicked out of their house.
LMAO.
This previous thread is right on with the comments. All we need is more therapy and I will be okay and you will be okay.
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1394411/posts
Looks like these fine Baptist shack-ups could have just kept living in sin and all this unpleasantness would have been avoided. The people involved in this mess struck me as phonies.
Now throw her stupid azz in jail and teach her and the other copy cats that will follow a LESSON!
I'm with you, this is possibly the most incredibly selfish thing I've ever heard. If she had some "fear of disappointing people" or whatever the psychobabbling talking heads are saying, she had plenty of opportunities to end the engagement, it happens every day. This didn't really surprise me at all, I remember thinking when I heard she had 14 bridesmaids and 600 guests that she was a very self-absorbed person.
And Satel and Hoffman had a great OP-ED piece in the Wall St Journal last week on this.
Let the psycho-babble begin!
Of course no one nowadays bears any personal responsiblity for selfish and narcissistic behavior, which causes great grief and sorrow to a large number of people.
John Mason is one lucky man to dodge the bullet of marrying this horrible woman. No wonder she's thirty-two with no prevous offers. All the other guys ran like blazes away from Psycho Bitch (aka Bridezilla).
I'll make a little wager that she was brought up in a very permissive atmosphere where she was never held responsible for anything that counted.
It was revealed that she had "issues that no one knew about". Supposedly, in the South, that means something.
Who knows!
Katie's probably called her already.
Oh, Baptists...well, that explains a lot.
They'll have to change their motto from "True Love Waits" to "Shacked Up and Putting Out Runs Away". ;)
And I love your triplet alien tag line.
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