KELLY RIPA
Show: "Live with Regis and Kelly" (ABC)
Age: 34
Love interest: Husband, actor Mark Consuelos
Children: Michael, 7; Lola, 3; Joaquin, 2
Big break: Playing Hayley on "All My Children" in 1990
Reported contract: $40 million for 5 years
Personal style: Downtown cool
Shade of blond: Beach
Pet cause: Kids
Viewers: 3.6 million a week
vs
KATIE COURIC
Show: "Today" (NBC)
Age: 48
Love interest: Sometime boyfriend, Red Sox co-owner Tom Werner
Children: Elinor, 9; Caroline, 5
Big break: Replacing Deborah Norville on "Today" in 1991
Reported contract: $65 million for 5 years
Personal style: Westchester mom
Shade of blond: Honey
Pet cause: Colon cancer awareness
Viewers: 6 million a week
I would rather watch Kelly any day. I wish I would have had the drive for TV when I was in school. Eight to 13 million bucks a year to drink coffee, laugh on cue and read a teleprompter sounds like a pretty good gig to me.
BTW: Is "Westchester Mom" the same as "Bitch"?
Only if you're being really mean. To female dogs.
Having handled a customer complaint line that dealt with a few Westchester Moms, I can say that honestly. At the time of this posting, there is more uppity poor white trash in Westchester's mansions alone than you could catch in a year with a million superglue-covered quarters in Mississippi. And don't even get me started on the upper middle class JAP types there. That's another level of "Westchester Mom" that even further transcends merely being described as female dogs.