Posted on 04/10/2005 8:43:30 AM PDT by Dan from Michigan
Drivers quick with an excuse
Sunday, April 10, 2005
By Larry O'Connor
When confronted by a traffic cop, motorists will say the darnedest things to dismiss their misdeeds.
Last year, police agencies in Jackson County doled out 47,005 tickets. In return, officers writing those dreaded citations heard at least that many excuses.
Few are original and even fewer are legitimate, officers say.
"Only in about 2 percent of the cases will they tell you the truth," said state Trooper Dave Clark, a 16-year road patrol veteran.
At least in one instance, the oft-repeated claim of urgently needing to go to the bathroom was no snow job.
About 21/2 years ago, sheriff's Deputy Dan Deering stopped a driver who was zipping down U.S. 127 well over the posted 55 mph limit.
The driver claimed she had to go to the bathroom.
To flush away doubt, she bolted past the deputy, ran into the adjacent woods and proceeded to relieve herself, Deering said. In the passenger seat, her husband sat dumbfounded.
"I handed him the ticket," said Deering, a seven-year road patrol veteran.
Another speeding driver claimed to be on his way to Foote Hospital to deliver vital organs for transplant surgery.
With no heart or kidney in the front seat, Jackson police Officer Chuck Brant was somewhat dubious and ticketed the driver. Another driver later offered the same excuse but at least produced a bag of blood products.
"I let him go," said Brant, the city's top traffic enforcement cop.
For the ticket writer, part of the fun is poking holes in the concocted claims.
"I put (the excuses) into the top of the funnel and keep pushing them down with questions," Deering said. "Pretty soon the funnel is upside down."
I need to get a sheriff's association sticker.....
I tell them I'm on the way to Washington to help President Bush design a proper reception for the Argellian space aliens due here on Thursday, and if I don't get out of this ticket, they will blow up the planet Earth.
Now that's just plain old mean.
Naughty, Naughty! I got a ticket in Georgia a year and a half ago while driving to Florida to see my friend. It was the first time I had ever driven to Florida. I was driving the entire 15 hours straight through and she was worried about me and she told our friend in CA that I said if I got sleepy I would pull into a service plaza and take a nap in my car. Well, my friend in CA called me on my cell phone, it was about 2:00 A.M., and was fussing at me telling me I could not do that because it was dangerous. It was a clear night and I was passing all the traffic, what little there was. Just then, blue lights started flashing behind me. I told my friend that I had to hang up because a police man was behind me flashing his lights. She was worried and wanted to know if I wanted her to stay on the line. I told her it was ok, he was a real cop because it was a real cop car. He came to my window and asked to see my driver's license and insurance card. I fumbled around in my messy purse looking for my driver's license. I was very nervous because I could not find it right away and could not remember if I even had my insurance card. I thought they wanted the vehicle registration thing. Well, I told him I had not had a speeding ticket since I was 26, and I was 54, and I was telling him about my friend and my vacation and he told me to calm down and he asked me if I knew how fast I was going and I said well I thought I was doing 80 and he said he clocked me at 88. The speed limit was 70. I said well, I was looking for Jacksonville and I didn't know where I was, and he said I was in Georgia and Jacksonville was a little bit up ahead. He asked me, after I found my license, if I wanted him to check his radar gun, and I said yes, please. I just could not remember where that insurance thing was. Then I checked my little duffel bag next to Moosie, who was riding shotgun, (Moosie is the stuffed moose that I sleep with); and, sure enough, there it was. So, when he came back, I proudly gave it to him. Then he gave me the clipboard to sign, telling me that signing it did not mean that I was guilty. I said, "Well, if you say I am guilty , then I must be." He said, "Yes, Ma'am." Then he said he had knocked the speed down so I would not get any points against my license. Then he suggested I get a hotel in Jacksonville and get some rest. Then he said, "Miss Virginia, now you drive safe for me now. We have had some wrecks out here tonight." Wasn't that sweet? The next time I got pulled over was on the way back from another trip and just 20 min. from home. I did have to go to the bathroom and I was tired. I told the officer that when he pulled me over and I told him all about my itinerary, etc. I talked just like this. His eyes bugged out and he backed away from the car and told me he was giving me a break and to have a safe night and rushed back to his cruiser. :) No more speeding tickets. The police are always nice to me. :)
Then he didn't write the ticket for "Failure to signal while being pulled over"?
Tell me about it. The speedometer cable came loose, so I never knew how fast I was going. The driver's door latch rusted through so I had to keep it closed with the seatbelt. The driver's seat back broke and was permanently reclined. Then, like your car, the tail lights shorted out and I couldn't locate the problem. When I got stopped for it, I didn't have my license on me, so I got to spend the night in Detroit's 13th precint lockup - my only night in jail (that I can remember).
My wife always used the "my husband is a cop" excuse. Worked most of the time, but I'd find the occasional warning ticket in her glove compartment.
"I put (the excuses) into the top of the funnel..."
An engineer friend told me of a guy he knew in school who got bagged for doing 90 in a 70 zone (freeway). He had a funnel taped to a hose outside the car window and the hose lead into the car and into a fish tank with fish. He told the cop he had calculated (engineering student) that he needed to go at least 87mph to induce air to flow from the funnel through the hose and into a diffuser in the tank. While he thought it creative, the cop still issued the ticket...
Nope, just "Failure to signal." I didn't signal when I pulled over, so that was true. He asked me why I didn't signal when he pulled me over, and I said that I was a bit flustered and was wondering why he was pulling me over, and I forgot. As we were the only two cars for miles and miles, there wasn't anybody to signal to except him.
If you admit you know that you were breaking the law, you will be ticketed. That's why they ask you.
I got ticketed in Cody Wyoming for going 48 in a 35; it was 0130 hrs., winter, not another car on the 5 lane road and dry and beautiful. I was livid. The Chamber of Commerce told me that they receive loads of complaints about their cops and their ticketing policies.
And just how many cops are in this county? How many drivers?
That is almost 129 tickets per day.
Ouch!
I did love my Golf, it handled nice and was rather responsive.
It just had issues.. everyone asked me how I could drive it without going insane due to the warning buzzer.
So I'd turn on the stereo to illustrate how.
It finaslly died due to the transmission going, twice.
I'd driven it for thirty thousand miles with a hole the size of a quarter in the differential.
When it finally died, the transmission was replaced, but wasn't done properly.
So it leaked all it's fluid whenever it was running.
So it could be driven three miles, and the transmission would need to be refilled.
After the second transmission fiasco, that car never moved again.
I do miss that car.
But I don't miss the tail lights blwoing out whenever something bumped the tail light assemblies.
I once got pulled over because the cop knew me. She asked if I could do her wedding photos in a month. Darn, I wanted to do other photos of her....she was a beaut.
I was waiting for the punchline: "Hey, that's not a radar gun!"
No offense, but you scare me.
Actually, the solution to the buzzer problem in the Golf was to pull the buzzer out and throw it away. Worked for me!
I am a habitual speeder but the only time I've ever gotten a ticket was when I wasn't speeding. I just merged on I-20 south of Dallas when 4 cars flew past me, one similar to my car at the time, a 3000GT. About a mile down the road a local cop pulls me over for doing 74 in a 55 (people in the Dallas area can attest to the pain in the ass areas of I-20 where the speed limit drops from 70 to 55 with no warning..)
Needless to say, when the cop mentioned I was speeding with a group of cars and I 'must have slowed down' when I saw him, I didn't even argue. I just took the ticket and did defensive driving....
(the really sad part is I was doing almost 100 on the way to Dallas earlier that day and didn't see a single cop)..
Every other time (many many many times..) I've been able to get out of a ticket by just saying "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't even realize it until I looked up and saw you.. you are right I was going over..."
They always just say be careful and have a nice day...
That'll put you out in the Atlantic somewhere.
If you're not actually an attorney, you're committing a much more serious crime than violating the speed limit.
I got a ticket for passing a stopped school bus loading children. It wasn't true but the cops often issue tickets for violations based solely on the bus drivers' claim.
I found out that the violation is not just a fine but a criminal offense that required a trial...it lasted 3 hours. It was me against the assistant district attorney, the bus driver and two cops. I proved that the bus driver was insane and won the case. Now you know what my screen name means.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.