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A spanking way to be happy
This is LONDON London Cuts section ^ | 03/30/05 | By Metro

Posted on 03/30/2005 11:42:45 AM PST by b4its2late

It may sound a bit kinky but everything from depression to alcoholism can be cured with a beating on the bare bottom, scientists claim.

Spanking is more effective than exercise at keeping the blues at bay, say Russian researchers who carried out tests on caning.

They recommend that people receive 30 weekly sessions of 60 of the best. High levels of pain make the body produce endorphins or 'happy chemicals' and this leads to feelings of euphoria.

Endorphins also boost the immune system, release sex hormones and reduce appetite.

Dr Sergei Speransky, who now charges patients £57 for treatment at Novosibirsk Institute of Medicine, said: 'The treatment works. I'm not sadistic, at least not in the classical sense, but I do advocate caning.'


TOPICS: Miscellaneous
KEYWORDS: exercise; spank; spanking
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To: b4its2late
"Dr Sergei Speransky, who now charges patients £57..."

Dr Sergei Speransky, also known by his trade name, Dr Strangelove Spanksky now charges patients £57...

That's better.

41 posted on 03/30/2005 12:05:03 PM PST by 506trooper (No such thing as too much guns, ammo or fuel on board...unless you're on fire)
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To: b4its2late

Youch.

This place is gettin' weird.

One post about spanking and....................

Well, gotta go........I'm off.....................


42 posted on 03/30/2005 12:05:08 PM PST by kahoutek
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To: Fintan

The Google images search on the word 'spanking' yeilds interesting results.


43 posted on 03/30/2005 12:05:27 PM PST by spodefly (This is my tag line. There are many like it, but this one is mine.)
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To: Dashing Dasher

Therapy ping!


44 posted on 03/30/2005 12:05:35 PM PST by pissant
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To: Mr. K
That's too close to "National Orgasm Day" proposed a few years back- which prompted the single most hilarious post reply I ever read (By Hillary's Lovely Legs) when she said:

"Oh great- Another national holiday that I wont get off"

Ooooooooh, Aaaaaah, Ooooooooh

45 posted on 03/30/2005 12:06:03 PM PST by P8riot (Growing old is mandatory, growing up is optional.)
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To: TXBSAFH
I mailed a wooden spoon to my daughter at college.

I made the outline of the spoon and faxed it to my accountant who was irking me no end.

I have quite the reputation....no nonsense mama.

46 posted on 03/30/2005 12:06:17 PM PST by OldFriend ("If there must be trouble, let it be in my day, that my child might have peace." Thomas Paine)
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To: RichInOC
How about spanking monkeys...uh, and other lower primates? Will that work?


47 posted on 03/30/2005 12:06:40 PM PST by Fierce Allegiance
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To: b4its2late
Dr Sergei Speransky, who now charges patients £57 for treatment at Novosibirsk Institute of Medicine, said: 'The treatment works. I'm not sadistic, at least not in the classical sense, but I do advocate caning.'

Ya' can't spell Speransky without Spanks.

48 posted on 03/30/2005 12:06:44 PM PST by TruthShallSetYouFree (Abortion is to family planning what bankruptcy is to financial planning.)
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To: Jaysun

LOLOLOL.....thanks for the laugh!!!


49 posted on 03/30/2005 12:06:53 PM PST by OldFriend ("If there must be trouble, let it be in my day, that my child might have peace." Thomas Paine)
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To: b4its2late

heh


50 posted on 03/30/2005 12:08:09 PM PST by Centurion2000 (Nations do not survive by setting examples for others. Nations survive by making examples of others)
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To: DTogo

Perhaps they didn't get to the spanking portion of the show before the camera went on the fritz.


51 posted on 03/30/2005 12:10:04 PM PST by Finger Monkey (H.R. 25, Fair Tax Act - do the research, contact your legislators, get this puppy passed.)
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To: TheBigB
"Endorphins also boost the immune system, release sex hormones and reduce appetite."

Well, B, I want to stay healthy, sexy, and thin...so LINE UP AND CRANK UP THE SPANKING MACHINE...I'm comin' through...TWICE. ;-)

52 posted on 03/30/2005 12:11:00 PM PST by Miss Behave (Beloved daughter of Miss Creant, super sister of danged Miss Ology, and proud mother of Miss Hap.)
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To: Jaysun
"...........beating her ass on the bathroom floor?"

Naw, man. Read the manual.

It says "........a beating on the bare bottom."

Sheesh.

53 posted on 03/30/2005 12:12:03 PM PST by kahoutek
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To: Miss Behave
Hold yer horses...I hafta replace the rubber bands and put in the new ball bearings...

It's ALL ball bearings these days...

54 posted on 03/30/2005 12:13:45 PM PST by TheBigB ("She's the kind of girl you bring home to Mother... if Mother is a cigaretty, retired hooker.")
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To: Mr. K

You know, they cut up the hotdogs in women's prisons.


55 posted on 03/30/2005 12:14:05 PM PST by P8riot (Growing old is mandatory, growing up is optional.)
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To: TheBigB

GULP.


56 posted on 03/30/2005 12:15:50 PM PST by Miss Behave (Beloved daughter of Miss Creant, super sister of danged Miss Ology, and proud mother of Miss Hap.)
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To: Jaysun

Bwaaahaaa. I hit my dog. She bit me in a fit of euphoria.


57 posted on 03/30/2005 12:15:54 PM PST by teenyelliott (Soylent green is made of liberals...)
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To: Jaysun
"Did I screw it up by surprising her, dragging her out of the shower, and beating her ass on the bathroom floor?"

You now owe me one keyboard and monitor... :-)

58 posted on 03/30/2005 12:16:29 PM PST by Raven6 (“The sword is more important than the shield and skill is more important than either. ")
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To: P8riot
You know, they cut up the hotdogs in women's prisons.

That's cruel.
59 posted on 03/30/2005 12:16:44 PM PST by Jaysun (I must warn you, I am a black belt in bullshitsu)
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To: TheBigB
Have you been bad?


60 posted on 03/30/2005 12:17:18 PM PST by OSHA (Beware! For they have discovered DEATH in the Constitution and have enshrined it into law.)
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