How the heck can someone be a combination of the two? Either you're a bastard or you're a loving husband. You can't be both.
You're thinking in the old way where right is right and wrong is wrong.
Today's thinking is, "what may be right for you is not necissarily (all right! I cannot spell!) right for me.
You start off doing the right thing (which from the reliable---note I said *reliable*---evidence is) and then you get tired and move on and don't divorce and let her parents take over care as they've requested.
That's how I voted.