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To: srm913

My first submarine had a new Ensign who reported onboard and was way too eager to suck up to the Captain. One day as the sub was making a surface transit to meet a ship for a personel transfer, the other officers informed him that he was designated to be the swimmer to go to the mail bouy. That, they explained to him, was an honor normally reserved for more senior officers, and that he must have really made an impression on the Captain.

They quickly prepared him for the task by having him strip to his underwear and smear himself with Vaseline (to make the water flow over his body easier). After donning flippers, a snorkel and a mask, he reported to the captain on the bridge...


187 posted on 03/02/2005 5:19:39 PM PST by deaconjim (Freep the world!)
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To: deaconjim

Excellent!


188 posted on 03/02/2005 5:23:39 PM PST by Dashing Dasher (Once you lose your fear, you become the people you once envied....)
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To: deaconjim

LOL!!!! That's TOO funny!


189 posted on 03/02/2005 5:26:16 PM PST by OHelix
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To: NormsRevenge; tubebender; B4Ranch; Pete-R-Bilt; ChefKeith
Put down your beer, then mash here
194 posted on 03/02/2005 5:33:06 PM PST by glock rocks (WYGIWYG)
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To: deaconjim

ROTFLMAO

And his name forever after was "Slick"?


214 posted on 03/02/2005 6:36:05 PM PST by B4Ranch
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To: deaconjim

It is going to take more time to set this one up than it did to execute it, so bear with me. I sailed for two years aboard the USAV Page, a 338-foot freighter functionally similar to a Navy LST. The ship had two sets of throttle controls--one set on the bridge and one set in the engine room. During landing and departure, the engines would be controlled by seamen on the bridge responding to the commands of the captain. Once underway, the bridge would call the engine room to transfer throttle control below. A pneumatic switch would be thrown and the engine room throttles would then take over. With experienced people at both ends, the engines would deviate less than 50 rpm when the switch was thrown. Crews on the bridge and in the engine room took great pride in their ability to make that transition smooth, whether the control was going from the engine room to the bridge or from the bridge to the engine room. One day about sunset, the question arose in my mind "What would happen if throttle control was passed to the bridge and they weren't expecting it?" We were offshore near Hon Tre Island, en route to Vung Ro Bay. A check of the horizon showed no traffic in sight. I snuck into the machine shop, picked up the phone and rang the engine room. When they answered, I gave the command "Throttle control to the bridge." They immediately complied. Up on the bridge, their throttles were set to idle, so when the engine room threw the switch, the engines slowed to their idle speed. That triggered the engine alarm sirens which require a crewman to run to the panel to throw the override switch. By then the ship was bobbing like a cork on the ocean swells. The officer of the deck is on the phone shouting to the engine room officer of the watch "What's going on down there?" He replies "Whaddya mean, what's going on down there? You guys called for throttle control to the bridge, so we gave it to you." "I did no such thing, Vencill" the officer of the deck said. "OK, we'll take 'em back." So the engine room restored cruise power to the two 1,200 horsepower diesel engines and the voyage continued as before. They never did find out who gave the command...


279 posted on 03/03/2005 8:45:32 AM PST by kilowhskey
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To: deaconjim
My first submarine had a new Ensign who reported onboard and was way too eager to suck up to the Captain. One day as the sub was making a surface transit to meet a ship for a personel transfer, the other officers informed him that he was designated to be the swimmer to go to the mail bouy. That, they explained to him, was an honor normally reserved for more senior officers, and that he must have really made an impression on the Captain. They quickly prepared him for the task by having him strip to his underwear and smear himself with Vaseline (to make the water flow over his body easier). After donning flippers, a snorkel and a mask, he reported to the captain on the bridge...

Sorry, I don't believe your tale. I met some real whiz-bangs in the Nav, including one officer who was a total dork, but even he was not stupid enough to buy into that set-up. That along with the more stringent screening that you sub people get would suggest it is unlikely that any officer would pull sub duty who is stupid enough to strip to his skivies, allow himself to be coated w/ grease and would walk to the bridge in mask fins and snorkle. All for mail that could be brought aboard with one of the transfers? I don't think so; your tale is your own shot at a sub-urban legend.

290 posted on 03/03/2005 1:44:08 PM PST by 70times7 (An open mind is a cesspool of thought)
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