I am pressed for time, so I have to excert your post to me... and just address a few things...
First, I only had my mother. No father past age 5 to speak of.
My church preached hellfire for all sinners, be it "lying" or "homosexuality". It pulled no bones that sin was sin and that all our works are like filthy rags to the Lord (who can't stand to look upon sin). Acting like something is not a sin does not change it. I am proud my mother help me understand that, yes. Sugarcoating sin does not do one any good. Rewarding sinful behavior with apathy does not help it one way or the other. Why do parent punish sinful behavior (at all ages)? They do it because they want their children to grow up to be as Christlike as possible. Hell is hot, I never want to see my children on that wide road leading towards it.
BTW.. Homosexuality is not a "PETTY" thing as you called it. It is a spit in God face. It is not a genetic flaw either, it is a lifestyle choise.
I still think there isn't *enough* fire and brimstone from the pulpit these days. :-)
RE: "It is not a genetic flaw either, it is a lifestyle choise."
Never said that it was a flaw, but it is genetic.