Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

To: Lurking2Long

Some women who are really capable of being nurturing and good educators, who are self-sufficient and have a lot to offer children...can't actually have children. Physically or for certain personal, medical reasons, some of us simply can't produce babies, which, in and of itself does not constitute the whole job of MOTHERHOOD. Some of us who are not biological mothers may still have a lot to offer young females, and not all of us are struggling to make ends meat, though most of us work hard indeed at what we do, and carry a sense of pride in that regard -- a pride and sense of accomplishment many mothers cannot offer their female offspring...because they never had it and never found a way to cultivate it. Some of us, when we are ready and able, want to offer education, travel, nuturing to younger women....to the next generation being born, whether the world is ready to feed them or not, and some of us want to help out and share our love and abilities. I am one such woman, and am in my 30s and a professor of women's history, and am an author, as well. I don't see why my own interest, love and generosity shouldn't go to a young female child who is abandoned, for cultural or socio-economic reasons. It is NOT a matter of ruining my body,but of living a long life and sharing that with a child who needs that strength. Although I do feel it BEST for children to have both a male and female parent...I wonder about all those little girls from China, Hungary and other war-torn or impoverished nations who need A MOTHER, who can be there for them, physically, mentally, and emotionally...who can offer better than what she is likely to get without someone like ME, who spent my life trying to be a role model to young women. I'm sorry some very misogynistic, adolescent and bitter, cynical comments have been made here, by some men and women, who have no real understanding of the variety of women's lives and the variety of life-choices out there, and I am disappointed by the comments from those who suffered badly from struggling single parents, who could barely manage them, as children. But realize, too, that NOT ALL single women are in that same situation as women who chose marriage and children before becoming educated or self-suffient, and who now find themselves struggling and flailing at being single parents. That has indeed gone on for generations, and that is why there are women making different choices these days...albeit not without opposition or struggle, but with some confidence. Some very educated, loving, generous and capable females, who have the money and willingness to care for another human, to make them civilized and offer them educational and other opportunities SHOULD adopt female children who have, for centuries, been victims of poverty, rape, and rampant, ruthless female infanticide in such places as China and Vietnam. My own mother had the body to produce many children, and had both a husband and a very bad marriage, which tortured me enormously, though I recovered through education and other forms of guidance. I have now a very good life, free of strife and unhappiness and struggle. Why should I not share that? Why should I not share that strength and good feeling? You need to look at things differently, if you remain so cynical about the choices women make with their bodies, energy, life, love and time. We're not all looking for an excuse for giving our lives meaning, through mere biological reproduction; some are giving meaning to those who don't even get that meaning from mothers who bothered to give birth to them, but simply cannot do the rest.


393 posted on 08/17/2006 10:52:54 PM PDT by E. Bovary
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies ]


To: E. Bovary

Being married doesn’t nec. guarantee a stable home. Provided w/ a choice between letting a responsible, single woman adopt vs. a highly disfunctional “family” I’d choose the single woman.


394 posted on 03/02/2008 10:31:49 AM PST by kristinr978
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 393 | View Replies ]

Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article


FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson