Replies

""For three months before our wedding we lived together to save money to pay for the wedding.""

Hey, AS long as the DATE was set. That's different. I'm not sure if your wife had children already, but you were there for three months, the date was set, the ring was bought, DIFFERENT from 7 years.

""There's a lot more here than just the moral considerations of shacking up.""

This woman had a daughter. This woman also had the type of man who was willing to live with her and her child for 7 years and was not willing to marry her. Where was was the ring? Oh, wait there wasn't one!

If she wants to devote 7 years of her life to a man who WON'T marry her FINE,(why buy the cow lala) she can waste her time. But to involve a child.

""Being a single parent is hard. Harder than you (hopefully) will ever know. """

It is hard. You know what else is harder? Being a 13 year old girl who is locked in a DOG KENNEL by her mother's LIVE-In-Boyfriend.

""some people just can't handle it and they make poor decisions, like this woman.""

Like this guy? Was putting a 13 year old in a dog Kennel Bad judgment? I'm sure this wasn't the first incident of WARNING. There is no excuse for letting someone do that to your child.

""The other consideration is that kids need a father figure.""
A live in boyfriend is not a good father figure. For one he won't commit- not a good example. And in this case, he was a real dirtbag.

If this woman wanted a boyfriend, that's fine. Don't get your kids involved until it gets serious.

""If their real dad doesn't give a damn and there are no uncles or grandpa around, someone needs to be there to tell the girls they're pretty and teach the boys how to spit.""

That was the cutest thing I ever read. But still, Live in boyfriends are Bad examples. And uncle or a grandpa is fine. And if a woman wants to get remarried, she shouldn't involve her children in her relationship until it gets to the point where marriage is a serious option. And then she needs to see how they interact.

And if a woman wants to get remarried, she shouldn't involve her children in her relationship until it gets to the point where marriage is a serious option. And then she needs to see how they interact.

So...in your opinion...a woman (or man) should give her (or his) heart to a prospective mate...get 100% emotionally involved...and then...and only them...find out if the mate and the children can handle each other?

Brilliance...talk about compounding the emotional distress on the single parent.

Sorry...I'm not meaning to sound hard or hateful...but this hits very close to home with me...my kids are my everything...that's why I am still single, and have not even been on dates for over 3 years.