Men Just Want Mommy

New York Times ^ | January 13, 2005 | Maureen Dowd

[Little Ray]

IMHO, a woman has to make a man feel needed, wanted, and useful. These things are important to any decent gentleman. He's not a toy, or a night's entertainment. He's a protector and a provider.

If a woman treats men like toys, or is a member of the "women need men like fish need bicycles" brigade, she needs to get used to being disappointed. She's not going to get a decent gentleman. Most likely, any man attracted her will be a cad.

Personally, I don't think Dowd or the actress she met is capable of making a man feel needed and useful, and would not accept him in the role of protector and provider.

[Max Combined]

'Any women who has been involved in high-end relationships knows the key to keeping the guy by your side is to keep him on edge.......constantly. He must never, ever know what you are going to do next."

That might be true in a romantic dating relationship, it is false in a long term marriage. My wife knows what I am going to do next and I know what she is going to do. We love and trust each other. We are not into playing games.

[FastCoyote]

"Well, if mommy looks like this, maybe:"

Oh Momma are you cruel! That picture brought tears to my eyes!

[AppyPappy]

It's actually taken from a speech given by a Reagan cabinet member. It caused a big stink in the media. I figured the political types would pick up on it.

[Gabz]

There is a difference, as wide as the pacific ocean though between being a strong woman, and being a bitch. The first is never the second, and the second always thinks she's the first.

Well said.

[Max Combined]

"My wife makes me get my own beer, and then helps me drink it......."

My wife will get me a beer if I ask her to do it. And she will do so without complaint or any ill feelings towards me for asking. I appreciate that, but just knowing that she will bring me a beer is enough; I get my own beer. It is no big deal one way or the other.

[GBA]

Wow...sounds like a really nice way to live. Thanks for the post.

[lentulusgracchus]

You are dense.....the trick is not to let the guy know it, silly.

No, I'm not dense. One, do you really think he won't ever notice? Two, what do you do then? Once he detects what you're doing, you will have a huge problem.

But the most basic question is, why do it at all? After all, even if he never notices, you'll always know you weren't straight with him.

[Enterprise]

"I think men go through life looking for a woman that will love them as much as their mom did"

Just curious, should a man go through life looking for a woman that won't love his as much as his mom did?

1. A man's mom loved him - should he look for a woman like her?
2. A man's mom loved him - he shouldn't look for a woman like her?
3. A man's mom didn't love him - should he look for a woman like her?
4. A man's mom didn't love him - he shouldn't look for a woman like her?

Now, considering that we are talking about familial love, wouldn't you be a bit suspicious of man #2? Wouldn't you be really suspicious of man #3? And man #4 would tend to seek a woman "who loved him" - like man #1's mother!

[HowlinglyMind-BendingAbsurdity]

One wonders if it has ever occurred to Maureen that the kinds of Manhattan power games she plays are just a wrong way to live and the wrong way to go about finding a loving husband. Ultimately, love is not about head games or power games.

[RinaseaofDs]

Folks, I think its much easier than that. Men and women both work hard, they come home, and for me at least, the last thing I want is someone who isn't willing to

1. Have a sense of humor about it.
2. At least split the work.

As long as you can still laugh together about your situation, there will still be a spark no matter how old you get.

I watched my Dad work three jobs and come home to a shrew that I encouraged him to leave. He didn't. He took a vow. Big lesson for me and many who were either products of divorce or wished that they were.

[theDentist]

CZJ sets the standard.. But my heart belongs to Renee Russo. :)

[January24th]

Dowd is turning into a rotting mummy who is unwrapping herself in public.

Best visual methaphor I've read in a long time. An excellent turn of phrase, right up there with many a Steyn-ism, and that's no faint praise. So, what was Mo saying about intelligent men? :)

[MAWG]

" It's bad enough to have to tolerate these self absorbed "Princesses" in the workplace...."

Heard that, ran into my share when I was in Corporate America. Only thing they are good for is bending over in the stairwell.

[Sarajevo]

I agree wholeheartedly. A successful relationship/marriage is no different than a successful partnership. Both parties need to work toward the common good.

I just wish she'd get the beer sometimes.....(humor off..)

[Gabz]

My wife makes me get my own beer, and then helps me drink it.......

Your wife and I might be secret sisters..................(J/K)

[lentulusgracchus]

....the kinds of Manhattan power games she plays are just a wrong way to live....

DINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGGG!!!

We have a winner!

[Junior]

Naw. Dowd's just angry because she turns men off and she doesn't understand why. Most men, when it comes down it, want a woman they can talk to about important things, but who will get down and dirty when the situation warrants. Most women seem to instinctually understand this.

[lentulusgracchus]

Hey, maybe Sarajevo actually is your husband!

Know your husband's FR username?

8^D

[cjshapi]

You know, I was sort of distracted when reading. Didn't even realize she was the author. She's crazy as a cootie. Thanks for pointing out the source!