Posted on 01/11/2005 5:19:00 PM PST by wagglebee
I love surfing wacko liberal websites. From them, I get a daily dose of good humor and ideas for future columns.
The most fun I get is surfing Michael Moore's website. I love reading the warped political commentary Mr. Moore posts on his site. I am sure in his mind, his ideas make perfect sense, but to me his ideas are just liberal propaganda coming from another Loony Left Coast Liberal.
In fact, since his ideas are so far to the left, I have theorized that someday Hollywood liberals and other wackos around the world will crown Michael Moore "King of the Loony Liberals."
So I was shocked when I read Moore's recent editorial "It's Time to Stop Being Hit ... a letter from Michael Moore". The editorial appears to be a call to arms to his legion of Loony Liberals around the country. Their new mission: to fight the traditional Democrat Party.
It seems Moore has crowned himself King, almost proving my theory right.
Apparently, according to Moore, the traditional Democrat Party is out of touch with most Democrat voters today. The party needs to move to the left and he proposes they do just that. It's strange, I thought moving the party to the left is what got Democrats in trouble in the first place.
Mr. Moore - I'll just call him King Michael from here out - wants to make changes to the current Democratic Party and bring it up to Loony Liberal standards. After all, the Loony Liberals in Hollywood, with the help of Howard (The Screech) Dean and Moveon.org, raised more money than traditional Democrats during the 2004 presidential election.
In his editorial King Michael writes: "What's worse is to watch the pathetic sight of the DLC (the conservative, pro-corporate group of Democrats) apologizing for being Democrats and promising to "purge" the party of the likes of, well, all of US!" He continues, "The days of trying to move the Democratic Party to the right are over."
I am still in shock after reading his words. King Michael, the slim, dashingly handsome, well-dressed, brilliant intellectual genius and King of the Loony Liberals, is going to rescue the Democrat party by going to war against traditional Democrats. In doing so, he wants to move the party FARTHER to the left.
I am not sure what type of mushrooms King Michael had been eating when he came up with his idea, but if anyone believes this can actually happen, then I guess they must also believe that Michael Moore is really a slim, dashingly handsome, well-dressed brilliant intellectual genius. Say that three times real fast after a few beers.
After reading his editorial, my first thoughts were ways Democrats could stop this lunatic from ruining their party. Just think what will happen to our current political system if we let the Loony Liberals have their way. Roughly 70 percent of middle of the road Democrats will abandon their sinking ship and switch parties.
The Democratic Party would soon consist of a bunch of tree hugging, pony tailed, 60-year-old men who still live in their mothers basements. Oh yeah, I almost forgot to mention all the anarchist, abortionist, anti-gun, peace loving activist and other assorted wackos who would make up the remaining core of their party.
Who in their right mind would ever vote for a group like that? We will end up with a country that has only one major party, the Republican Party.
Who does King Michael think he is, Captain Ahab chasing Moby Dick? Does he hate George W. Bush so much that he would ruin his own party for fatheaded revenge? Maybe he has a problem with self-esteem; he is slightly overweight after all. Maybe his ball cap is just too tight.
How can Democrats stop King Michael? My first thought was to throw him a box a Twinkies and hope he chokes on the creamy white filling. Wait, too easy; he would wolf them down in a millisecond.
Maybe we should have the guys from "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy" give him a complete makeover and pray he becomes a conservative. No, we don't want someone so obnoxious becoming a Republican.
What can we do? Think, think...
Wait a minute. What am I saying? Ronald Reagan would roll over in his grave if any conservative tried to help stop Moore. Of course, we need King Michael running the Democrat Party. What better way to put another conservative in the oval office in 2008?
Please forget my ideas about how to stop this from happening. Please let Mr. Moore have his way. I would actually love to see him running the Democratic party. And being a good sport, I would like to volunteer my services to help the Moore and his Loony Liberal cause any way I can.
Maybe I can hand out Twinkies at the next Michael Moore fundraiser.
Too true.
So true
I don't think Moore's ideas make any sense to him; because I think it is a con game to him.
I think Moore is nothing but a con artist or snake oil salesman.
Sadly - you are right. The libs are loosing it.
UUUGHHHhhh! He needs to go on that new reality show ''The Biggest LOSER!!!
Even the Moore-on knows a bunch of brainless suckers when he see's them. He'll take the Loons for another ride and pocket another 100,000,000 DUmmie $$$'s
On top of that little do his supporters realize the contempt and hatred he has for them too.He has made his revulsion of America very clear.
I lurk, and sometimes attempt to disrupt over at DUhhh, and these clowns worship this fool. The vast majority of them are CONVINCED that their party needs to move further left.
I don't get it...I really don't.
Moore isn't exactley known for his friendlyness towards blue collar workers when he is making his films.
In fact, if you have to associate with him, he seems act like your a loser (associate meaing hold a camera, do the catering, film work, etc). I always found his contempt for those who work for him to be especially heinious, since he claims to speak for blue collar workers.
Thats because your sane, if you lose your mind, you'll, maybe understand them.
Keep in mind, after 9/11, I remember some liberal boards (not sure if DU was one of them, I think it was) were embarrassed because democrats in the house and senate took part in the pledge of allegiance on the capital steps.
Okay, I'm going to get flamed for this, but I just saw this movie on cable, Canadian Bacon, which was made by Mike. It is one of the funniest movies I have ever seen.
Fat Mickey is in it for the money and all the praise he receives for playing his role as the anti Bush.Just think of the ego boost a guy who grew up as a big fat ugly goose egg must feel now that he's the man.I feel nothing but hate for the filthy pig but I have to admit he's a big fat greasy gift to the republican party.
Could we be looking at a Three Party System in our future? king mackrel, ooooooops, king michael, dean the scream and others of the Lunatic Left will refuse to contribute to the democrats if they aren't allow to control the process. Thus, there is more than an even chance the democrats will split into 2 parties. With the lunatic element in control of much of the party at this time, they may choose to forgo the name democrats and become, progressives. I can forsee the lunatic fringe merging with the "green" party, thus being somewhat larger, but still smaller than the democrat party of today. Those who still maintain a small fraction of intelligence will gravitate to the right, but not sufficiently to become Republicans. This segment will retain the name democrats. They may pick up some of those who call themselves independents, but who most often vote with the democerats. Both parties, individually, will be much smaller than the democrat party of today.
Yes, and so do the other assorted con men who fleece the DUmmies. They are marks just waiting to give away their money, begging the con men to take it and tell them another story they want to here.
"Their new mission: to fight the traditional Democrat Party."
Hey, where can we send the thank-you notes? ;')
Karl Rove is paying this guy under the table. I'm becoming more certain of that every time I read this stuff!
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