Posted on 01/10/2005 4:11:37 PM PST by Sub-Driver
Man Eats Raw Duck Before Undies Save Him
22 minutes ago
ROGERS, Ark. - There's a reason Mom says to always have a fresh pair of underwear. The Rogers city attorney learned this week that it's to attract rescue helicopters.
Ben Lipscomb found himself lost in the flooded backwoods of Bayou Meto this week while duck hunting with his Labrador retriever, Josey Wales.
He only managed to make it out by tying his white briefs to the end of his gun barrel and waving them at an Arkansas State Police helicopter.
Decked out in full camouflage hunting gear, Lipscomb was practically invisible as the helicopter made several passes at dusk.
"They had passed over me a couple of times," he told the Morning-News of Northwest Arkansas after he was safe and sound back at his City Hall desk. "I knew I had to do something to get their attention."
Anticipating a cold night in the wilderness, Lipscomb drank dirty bayou water and ate a raw duck breast before he was spotted.
(Excerpt) Read more at news.yahoo.com ...
I guess that teddy has to go then. Sigh...the sacrifices we have to make to keep you ladies happy.
I'm ashamed to say I Laughed out loud at that....
You can live up to thirty days without food and up to three days without water?
What wine should one serve with raw duck?
LOLPDML
S-M-E-E...That's the funniest thing I've seen in a while, thanks.
. . . and fools seldom differ.
Is that why you're married to Eaker? Just kidding, heh heh.
LOL
That's more than I wanted to know.
I'll bet Josey Wales was darn glad his doofus master had the duck to eat!
The dog wasn't lost! If the underwear waving duck eater had died of food or water poisoning the dog would have just turned toward home and started hoofing it!
That has got to be frustrating--being lost with a dog and trying to figure out some way of getting HIM to head for home!
When Benny Hill passed away, I became King Leer.
Well, isn't the purpose of the tinfoil to keep the mind control rays away from the brain? Tinfoil underwear sounds to me more appropriate than a beanie, in most cases.
That guy in the picture is 18 years old? Eating your underwear ages you fast, doesn't it?
Just a thought.
I'm real bad.
Well that's quite an old story. I don't think Bibi Baskin would do it for anyone these days! *L*
Fart-fighting underwear invented
Source: Ananova
Published: Story filed: 16:35 Friday 15th June 2001 Author: Editorial Staff
Posted on 06/15/2001 10:47:01 PDT by vannrox
An inventor from Colorado has created the world's first fart-proof underwear http://www.freerepublic.com/forum/a3b2a4a156f23.htm
Men Arrested For Wearing Thong Underwear In Wal-Mart ("Triple dog dare") WFTV ^ | 7/29/04
Posted on 07/29/2004 8:24:06 AM EDT by Doctor Wu
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1180787/posts
Underwear Thief Burglarizes Another Home (Ladies, lock up your undies!)
AP via The Carolina Channel ^ | 1/20/03 | AP
Posted on 01/21/2003 9:26:49 AM EST by wimpycat
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/826550/posts
Larry Gogan is a veteran Irish broadcaster. But he's had quite a few clangers on air.
Here's another:
Larry Gogan: "Name the BBC's Grand Prix commentator? I'll give you a hint. It's something you suck...."
Contestant: "Oh, Dickie Davies." (Murray Walker is the correct answer)
Maddog 22, from the cellars of Morgan David.
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