The boy should wrestle to win - beating down a girl is better than being beaten down by a girl, if you ask me. If she wants to compete, he should give her everything he has and not worry about where to grab her, etc. Just beat her (if he can).
And may the best athlete win, in any case! :-)
What you say sound good in theory but what are most boys taught from an early age.
Its not OK to hit girls, There are places you dont touch a girl & so on....
So now you take young boys and put them on the mat with a girl.
Were do you grab them? If you watch the story. You can see some of the boys trying to answer this. When they would normally do a quick clamp around the chest. There hesitating and pulling on the arms.
Remember were talking about 7 & up here.