Keep your day job--you are NOT a comedian. I have never download a spyware program--I visited Drudge and it came in uninvited that way. I run Norton Anti-virus and Security but they still got in. Yesterday we added Webroot and it found over 400 spyware programs even though we thought we were careful.
I got webroot (spy sweeper) a few weeks ago & it found oodles more that spy bot & ad-aware had missed