The State may have the authority, via the 9th and 10th Amendments. Personally, since it is a religious issue, it should be up to the churches. If some wacko churches want to have female priests, or to marry two homosexuals, go to town! But don't expect my private insurance company to give you health coverage! If someone else's private insurance firm will, that's great. More power to the Free Market.
A crime is an action that initiates fraud or force against a person or their property. It will always be a crime to murder me, or steal my money, regardless of whether there is a law against it or not.
Sorry. Words do have meanings. It is not criminal unless it is LEGALLY prohibited.