John Kerry is running for President..And he wants you to know....
he is well balanced...
he fears no obstacle..
he shows power in style....
he is manly....
..uhhhh...well sort of manly....
But at least he can turn orange on command.
Just like the Oompa Loompas!
Plus he likes Orange bowling. Don`t you do too?
And he is racially sensitive....
And he is intimidated by steelworkers (as we all are).
Plus he can step on the US flag while speaking about why he loves the flag...
But he is reporting for Duty!
And he gets soccer balls stuck to his forehead from the botox leaking out.......
Oh yes, and he is reporting for duty......
And he`s afraid of getting hit in the face by a football
Ouch I say!
And he knows how to cut in line and step over ropes for a photo op...
And he can imitate a monkey....
And he also has a cool finger that has mutated freakishly long from constant use pointing blame at other people..
So here he comes...
THE BIGGEST FREGGIN` DORK TO EVER RUN FOR PRESIDENT!
JOHN `EFFEN KERRY!!
"Mama! Wawa! Goo goo! Mama! Wawa!"
Vote Kerry this election day and support his fulltime hobby.
