U.N. Election Monitors Think Elections A Good Idea (Humor)

Some U.N. election monitors preparing to help conduct Iraqi elections in January think elections are a good idea, a memo stated yesterday. The monitors, from North Korea, Cuba, Vietnam, Iran, and other dictatorships, will assist Iraqis elect a new leader in four months, depending on how quickly the U.S.-led coalition can arrange meetings between barbaric, blood-soaked terrorists and untold virgins.

Some rumblings from the U.N. also hint the organization will monitor U.S. elections this November – ostensibly to prevent fraud, but in reality to "somehow twist the votes around so our boy Kerry becomes president."

"Elections...yeah, now that seems kinda cool," said Guillermo Cortez. the Cuban monitor. "In my country, Castro always gets like 98% of the vote...I'm starting to get a little suspicious."

Iran's Abiz al-Arraqwai also thinks elections are a good idea. "The mullahs in Iran, those chaps aren't too keen about elections," al-Arraqwai said. "In fact, since I'm out of my country, I'll just go ahead and say it...the leaders of Iran are major-league assholes!"

"Probably get a fatwa declared against my ass," al-Arraqwai continued, "but I don't really care at this point."

The North Korean representative, who requested anonymity but "probably has a 'Kim' somewhere in his name," also agreed.

"My so-called leader, 'Lil Kim, makes the mullahs and Castro look like Winston Churchill," the North Korean said.

U.N. General Secretary Kofi Annan, when asked if there "wasn't just a tad of hypocrisy in having Cubans and Iranians telling Iraqis and Americans how to vote," only said the United States "was directly or indirectly responsible for most of the world's suffering." Asked where he received such an opinion, other than 95% of the U.N., Annan said "Michael Moore told me so."

Let's see. Would the same UN crew that did such a good job with the food for oil program be in charge of the Iraqi elections ?

They'll probably take bribes for casting fraudulent votes like the Californians do, and toss others out.

How about elections in the Sudan - Heard anything about that lately out of the UN ?

2 posted on 09/24/2004 2:59:42 PM PDT by Gary - Peters (Kerry Insecure to relinquish Congressional Job.)

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