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Kerry's Cast of Thousands
NY Times ^ | September 18, 2004 | DAVID BROOKS

Posted on 09/17/2004 9:56:10 PM PDT by neverdem

OP-ED COLUMNIST

Across the wine-dark sea they come, honing Kerry's message. They come from Harvard, K Street and the studios of CNN. "Once more into the breach!" they cry, as they join the conference call of thousands.

Look at them, these great, unhuddled masses, yearning to wear White House badges. They are consultants, flacks, spinners, strategists, Knights of the Palm lunch table. And yet they come as one, from all corners of the Democratic world, to figure out what John Kerry, age 60, should believe and say.

Into the valley of hope ride the 600, the inner ring of Kerry confidants. A year ago, there was just a small and hearty band. There was the campaign manager Jim Jordan. There was Gibbs, Cherny and Mellman. But under their reign, the message was not honed. The candidate did flounder. The quest for a Kerry conviction was not fulfilled.

And so the great accretion began. The call went out to pollsters, wonks and wandering wordsmiths to come gather and fill the void of Kerry's core. Brave souls emerged from the Land of Ted - the Kennedy brigades led by Cahill and Cutter are now abetting the mighty Shrum.

Boldly they rode and well, into the morass of Kerry's mind. Through the thicket of equivocations they ventured, across the paradoxical plains of Kerry's prose - all in the quest for a conviction.

Policy committees gathered. Of domestic policy councils there were 37. Of foreign policy councils, 27.

And in each of these councils resided faculties and think-tankers by the score. On the justice policy task force there were 195 members, lawyers brave and strong. On the economic council, more than 200 economists did search for a conclusion. When these groups did meet, so long was the line of approaching Volvos that it was visible from outer space.

Yet still the message was not honed. King Kerry still did equivocate, hedge and reverse. Of flip-flops there were more than a few. He still did Velcro his principles upon the cathedral door, and change them by the hour.

The apparatus grew again. Elmendorf from the Land of Gephardt was hired, along with Lackey from the House of Edwards. Teams of de-equivocators gathered. And still the fog spread.

And so the age of nymphomottomania did begin. Suddenly it was realized what was missing. A theme! A slogan! The muses were mobilized to find that motto, which would give shape and precision to the cause. Over the weeks "A Better Set of Choices" begat "Safer, Stronger and More Secure," which begat "The Real Deal," which begat "Change Starts Here," which begat "Let America Be America Again," which begat "Hope Is on the Way."

Night and day the serial sloganators did work. And the seasons did turn and the conventions did come and go. Kerry's speeches were shortened, and parts of his life were edited out of his story (adulthood, for example). And yet there was still wailing in the House of Kerry for the message was still unhoned.

Kerry himself pinpointed the problem. Of advisers, there were not enough! So this month yet more were brought in, mostly from the camp of Clinton. There is McCurry, Lockhart, Carville and Begala. There is Greenberg and Wolfson.

And so it came to pass there are no swing voters left, because they've all been hired by campaign Kerry. They form a great and mighty leviathan, dedicated to the proposition that John Kerry should believe in something. The flow chart is as clear as can be. Sasso reports to Lockhart, Devine, Sosnick, Cutter and Cahill, while Cutter reports to Devine, Mellman, McCurry, Shrum and herself - except on weekends, when Devine reports to Mellman and Sosnick and Cahill reports to McCurry and Sasso. Lockhart handles strategic response, McCurry daily response, Cutter tactical response and Cahill metaresponse.

Vast is the empire crafting Kerry's creed. Immense is the army of Michelangelos trying to sculpture the melted marshmallow of Kerry's core. And the seasons do turn and the polls do shift and the rending of garments gives way to the sunshine of hope and back again.

And tumultuous is the cry of the strategists, and loud are the furies of the campaign, but in the center there is a silence. For in the beginning all was vacuum and a void, and while all the king's horses and all the king's men do build this grand and mighty structure, the sound of their hammers echoes limitlessly in the hollow within.


TOPICS: Editorial; Foreign Affairs; Government; News/Current Events; Politics/Elections; US: District of Columbia
KEYWORDS: clintonistas; davidbrooks; kerry; napalminthemorning
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1 posted on 09/17/2004 9:56:10 PM PDT by neverdem
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To: neverdem

Good read.


2 posted on 09/17/2004 10:01:56 PM PDT by CWOJackson
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To: neverdem

Finely composed.!


3 posted on 09/17/2004 10:04:07 PM PDT by noodler
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To: neverdem

This pretty much sums up Kerry and his campaign. In a single word: vacuous.


4 posted on 09/17/2004 10:05:22 PM PDT by kesg
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To: neverdem
It matters not how many managers there are in the Kerry campaign. They cannot create a silk purse out of a sow's ear.

No matter what they try, they still only have Kerry to work with.

5 posted on 09/17/2004 10:06:35 PM PDT by Doug Fiedor
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To: noodler

Fuuny as all git out. This guy can write. How he managed to finish it before he laughed himself to death, I'll never know.


6 posted on 09/17/2004 10:07:02 PM PDT by planekT
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To: neverdem

That is freaking Beautiful


7 posted on 09/17/2004 10:07:21 PM PDT by SShultz460
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To: neverdem
Teams of de-equivocators

Snicker.

8 posted on 09/17/2004 10:07:33 PM PDT by Drango (PJs? Never. FReep in the "Buff")
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To: neverdem

Here, here ..very nice.


9 posted on 09/17/2004 10:09:58 PM PDT by madison46 (Bandwagon was full when it left the gate - I hope it remains too full for frogs & co.)
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To: planekT

How did he get past NYT editors?


10 posted on 09/17/2004 10:10:56 PM PDT by madison46 (Bandwagon was full when it left the gate - I hope it remains too full for frogs & co.)
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To: neverdem

A horde of intellectuals and elites are unable to give Kerry a soul.

Brilliantly written.


11 posted on 09/17/2004 10:16:33 PM PDT by NewMediaFan (Fake but accurate)
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To: madison46

NYT editors? You think they read the stuff they print? Come on.


12 posted on 09/17/2004 10:18:36 PM PDT by GRANGER (Must-issue states have safer streets.)
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To: neverdem
Echoes in a vacuum?
13 posted on 09/17/2004 10:22:05 PM PDT by per loin (This tagline has not been censored!)
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To: neverdem
"He still did Velcro his principles upon the cathedral door, and change them by the hour."

Wonderful imagery and very funny.

14 posted on 09/17/2004 10:44:50 PM PDT by Unmarked Package
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To: neverdem
When these groups did meet, so long was the line of approaching Volvos that it was visible from outer space
15 posted on 09/17/2004 11:21:46 PM PDT by 1stMarylandRegiment (CBS Boycott day 004 and counting)
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To: neverdem
I had expected to see visions of Saruman and his army of remorseless orcs advancing on the Shire. Its perhaps just as well Kerry is too boring to be the bad guy in The Lord Of The Rings.
16 posted on 09/17/2004 11:22:12 PM PDT by goldstategop (In Memory Of A Dearly Beloved Friend Who Lives On In My Heart Forever)
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To: neverdem

Damn, must be a Kerry sidelined insider.


17 posted on 09/17/2004 11:22:34 PM PDT by Ursus arctos horribilis ("It is better to die on your feet than to live on your knees!" Emiliano Zapata 1879-1919)
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To: 1stMarylandRegiment; 1Mike; 3catsanadog; ~Vor~; ~Kim4VRWC's~; A CA Guy; A Citizen Reporter; ...
Into the valley of hope ride the 600, the inner ring of Kerry confidants.

Government-in-waiting bump!

18 posted on 09/17/2004 11:24:01 PM PDT by Howlin (What's the Font Spacing, Kenneth?)
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To: Unmarked Package

I knew Martin Luther. I worked with Martin Luther. I served with Martin Luther . . .


19 posted on 09/17/2004 11:25:21 PM PDT by 1stMarylandRegiment (CBS Boycott day 004 and counting)
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To: Doug Fiedor

Right, lipstick on a pig doesn't hide the fact it is still a pig, an ugly pig yet.


20 posted on 09/17/2004 11:25:49 PM PDT by Ursus arctos horribilis ("It is better to die on your feet than to live on your knees!" Emiliano Zapata 1879-1919)
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