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To: Marie

Have you had a child with Hydrocephally?

I have personally known 2 women who did. They both had their children. One had her son for 6 months. She keeps his photo on the wall. She and her husband loved him. They cared for him and were so happy to have had the chance to know him, even if it was a short time. My friend is now a counselor, who helps other people deal with grief. She knows what grief is. She knows what disappointment and loss of hope are. She has been through it, and come out the other side! She went on to have 6 other children!

My other friend had a doctor who told her that she needed to let the baby starve to death, so that she didn't prolong her "misery". She loved her baby. She didn't care what the child was like. She refused. She kept feeding and loving the child for weeks--under constant pressure from her doctor and family to let her baby die. Her husband gave her a very hard time about feeding the child. He hid the bottles and made it very hard for her. Unfortuately, the baby died after a few instances of her arguing with her husband. My friend has felt guilt for 15 years over this. It ruined her relationship with her husband and they divorced.

Death is a part of life. A part that we must face and not avoid. God gives us many lessons and blessings in the midst of that struggle, that we miss if we try to avoid it. To give birth to a child, and while it is still in the birth canal, to crush it's head and kill it, because it was deformed, will leave a person with guilt and sorrow for the rest of their lives.

Whether a person is "wanted" is not a reason to decide the value of their lives. Their lives have value because they are created by our Creator.


51 posted on 09/18/2004 11:37:33 AM PDT by tuckrdout (Pardon Teri Schindler (Schiavo), sentence her husband/torturer.)
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To: tuckrdout
I honestly don't think we're talking about the same thing. In the extreme cases I'm talking about, the baby's head can be 30-40 inches in diameter and impossible to deliver. The only option to the PBA technique is a C-section. PBA is safer for the mother in those cases. I was tired when I posted and I may have gotten the name of the disorder wrong.

I am not saying that all babies born with hydrocephally should be PBA. I am saying that this option should be available for those extreme situations when the baby's head is way too large for birth and there is no hope for the child to live outside the mother.

Death is a part of life. A part that we must face and not avoid. God gives us many lessons and blessings in the midst of that struggle, that we miss if we try to avoid it.

I couldn't agree more.

Whether a person is "wanted" is not a reason to decide the value of their lives. Their lives have value because they are created by our Creator.

Again, I couldn't agree more. I'm not talking about "wanted" or "unwanted" children. I'm talking about an extreme medical tragedy with which us poor humans can only deal with the best we can.

56 posted on 09/18/2004 12:27:07 PM PDT by Marie (Diversity is useless unless it is the result of the pursuit of excellence ~ Quinn)
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