All the President's Men [Who might be in a 'Kerry Kabinet']

The Boston Globe ^ | September 5, 2004 | By John Sedgwick

[johnny7]

Reaching out for a job in a possible Kerry administration is tricky business. Look too eager, and you're doomed. Stay invisible, and you'll be overlooked. Since presidential candidates refuse to say who's on their list for the top posts, we poked around for who we think is likely to land in a John Kerry White House. Just bear this in mind: Anyone who really knows the lineup isn't saying; and anyone who is saying doesn't really know.

[johnny7]

"Dukakis mastered the Massachusetts government," Vallely says. "But he viewed the United States as 50 states. I think Kerry starts with the world and then thinks of the United States' place in it."

Four years of Kerry and our economy will resemble the EU's... eight years and we'll be striving for third-world-status.

'Maddie' Albright chasing down tin-pot poobahs to ask them to stop financing terrorist scum. Kerry's brother as Attorney General... feverishly dismantling The Patriot Act and expanding our courts to handle the flood of cases generated by suicide bombings across the Nation! Joe Kennedy... working 24/7 to convert all off-shore drilling platforms into marine, eco-study centers... and all land-based drilling fields into federally subsidized housing projects.

Turn back the clocks to 1968 people...

[Paleo Conservative]

David Gergen

[Lonesome in Massachussets]

John Sedgwick from Massachusetts, huh? Author of the most famous last words in American history? Any relation to that other John Sedgwick from Massachusetts? Don't worry about the Swifties, John, they couldn't hit an elephant from this distance.

http://quotes.prolix.nu/Authors/?General_John_Sedgwick,_(1813-1864),_last_words

[hflynn]

After three decades in public life, John Forbes Kerry -- antiwar war hero and Irish Catholic Jewish WASP -- has yet to fully clarify who he is, who his friends are, and where he wants to take the country.

John Kerry has clarified exactly who he is, Mr. Flip-Flop.

[dyed_in_the_wool]

I really don't think this is an issue. Merely a reason for Bostonians to see their names in the paper for jobs they'll never get. Cameron Kerry for A.G.? Joe Kennedy for Energy Secretary? Bob Rubin for Treasury Secretary? Again?

Kerry would get lauged out of D.C.. Not that this isn't happening right now...

[foreverfree]

bump

[pabianice]

I nominate Janet Reno for Secretary of Housing and Urban Development.

[Izzy Dunne]

Teresa will be Secretary of State.

[IndyTiger]

Who might be in a 'Kerry Kabinet'

Carter and Clinton retreads. That alone should convince undecideds to vote for Bush.

[johnny7]

Kerry would get lauged out of D.C...

Whoa there... think back pal. Think 1976... think Carter... only instead of a pacifist Georgia cracker you got a pacifist Massachusetts brahmin.

Carter brought in a slew of dingbats with him. Sure the Washington press will chortle a bit but as soon as they are approved by Congress they become natural-born geniuses.

[johnny7]

Cahill is like a sappy, liberal version of Bush's Harris.

As brainless as Deedee Meyers with the pent-up frustration of a Janet Reno.

[No Surrender No Retreat]

I will nominate, Maxine Muddy Waters for the position of US Attorney General.

[SLB]

I wonder if we will survive some of these idiots? Joe Kennedy in energy? So much for drilling on the North Slope and achieving some sort of energy freedom from the rag heads.

GRAHAM ALLISON
CURRENT JOB: Harvard prof, F.O.B.
POSSIBLE JOB: Defense secretary

BOB RUBIN
CURRENT JOB: Citigroup director, F.O.B.
POSSIBLE JOB: Treasury secretary

MARY BETH CAHILL
CURRENT JOB: Campaign manager
POSSIBLE JOB: Chief of staff

BOB CROWE
CURRENT JOB: Kerry fund-raiser, F.O.J.
POSSIBLE JOB: Ambassador to a sunny island

JOE KENNEDY
CURRENT JOB: President, Citizens Energy
POSSIBLE JOB: Energy secretary

CAMERON KERRY
CURRENT JOB: Lawyer, RFK wannabe
POSSIBLE JOB: Attorney general

JOSEPH NYE
CURRENT JOB: Ex-dean of JFK School
POSSIBLE JOB: Deputy defense secretary

TOM VALLELY
CURRENT JOB: Harvard executive, F.O.J.
POSSIBLE JOB: Trade czar

[Tijeras_Slim]

H.L. Mencken's discription of FDR's administration...

surrounded by 'an astonishing rabble of impudent nobodies,' 'a gang of half-educated pedagogues, nonconstitutional lawyers, starry-eyed uplifters and other such sorry wizards.' His New Deal was a 'political racket,' a 'series of stupendous bogus miracles,' with its 'constant appeals to class envy and hatred,' treating government as 'a milch-cow with 125 million teats' and marked by 'frequent repudiations of categorical pledges.'

Sounds like the Dim roadshow whenever it hits town doesn't it?

[clamper1797]

Jane Fonda will be Sec of State

[leprechaun9]

Al Charleton - Secretary of Defense
Carol Nosey Braun - Drug Czar
Jessie Jettison - Head of Faith based Initiatives
Maxine Waters - Head of Homeland Security
Tom Harkin - Head of the Veteran's Administration
Teddie (the whale) Kennedy - Secretary of the Navy
Chris Dud (CT) - Head of bagmen for elections (assisted by Torricelli, Corzine - bad medicine from NJ & McGreedy)

[mass55th]

Whoever Hillary recommends.

[Defiant]

LOL at this paper actually writing an article about a possible Kerry Kabinet. Here's who he could have:

The Easter Bunny, Ag. Dept.
Chupakabra, FDA
ET, NASA head
Nessie, Secretary of the Navy
Bigfoot, Secretary of Defense
Harry Potter, Science Director
Sherlock Holmes, DOJ
Santa Clause, HHS

A Kerry Administration is more of a fictional concept than the above cabinet would be.