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To: HenryLeeII
I bin using that DD-214 stuff on my front lawn t' git rid of pests an' such. It werks good on the chiggers, but I still git salesmen and Yankees at my door sometimes! You know of anythin' more p'awrful 'n DD-214?

More powerful than DD-214? MaryLou gots a pair of D... oh, ... nevermind.

Once the oldest gal child started blossomin *had to wait till she was 13), we couldn't keep the salesman and all away. Then I started makin' 'em drink a bit of the ol' special brew - corn likker, hot sauce and branch water (I don't even drink it). If they said no I grabbed my shotgun an accused them of being prejudiced. They'd pop the cork, take a little swig, turn green, their hair'd stand stright up and they's pass out.

Ol' Red'd go over and start licking them on the face, sometimes he even slipped 'em some tung, they'd finally wake up, take on look at ol' Red, then take off breakin the hunnert yard dash record. Last'n I herd, a few had to be checked into the hospital over in Putnam County. They don't come back. I can send you a jug if you like, but ye gotta send over that asbestos blanket to wrap it in.

71 posted on 08/31/2004 11:00:24 AM PDT by 4CJ (||) Men die by the calendar, but nations die by their character. - John Armor, 5 Jun 2004 (||)
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To: 4ConservativeJustices
I can send you a jug if you like, but ye gotta send over that asbestos blanket to wrap it in.

Well, I gotta figger sumthin' else out, cuz Lucy May Belle came down with a bad case of the flu or sumthin' last week. Henry III sez its from playin' near the coolin' tower over at the nook'ler plant - he's all full o' hisself now that he done gradeate the sixth grade! Its just a cold or sumthin', but anyway, Lucy May Belle took to usin' the asbestos blanket fer the chills an' won't give it up now! My naybor got a El Camino with a tarp in the back - that may do the trick - he ain't never got caught when runnin' a load, so I may have t' borry it t' pick up a batch o' yer special brew.

72 posted on 08/31/2004 11:41:59 AM PDT by HenryLeeII (sultan88, R.I.P.)
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