Posted on 08/06/2004 10:18:58 PM PDT by CarrotAndStick
It is unfortunate that civilisation has taken a firm position against the institution of public scratching. Apes do it, lions do it, squirrels do it with abandon.
In this context, I am happy to report that the Indian Man, particularly the North Indian variety, has refused to submit to the arcane ways of civilisation and continues to scratch away at himself with some diligence.
In his case, the scratching is localised in a part of the anatomy that occurs frequently in his conversation, often with reference to some close relatives.
To the lay eye, there are three distinct ways of practising this endangered art. The first is the art of the Sprawling scrawl. Here the hand moves expansively and builds up a nice rhythm of sorts.
The concerned area is strummed extravagantly and the nails are used to provide additional texture to the pleasure. The Sprawling Scrawl occurs during conversation, acting as a sort of mental percussion to keep the conversational ball rolling.
The Precise Pinch, however, comes from a completely different school of thought. For the Precise Pincher, the quest is more analytical as he methodically closes in on the itch and nails it in a soul-satisfying pinch.
This is an act that requires a great deal of concentration and is, therefore, unlikely to be accompanied by much conversation.
This is the solitary brooding thinker among the scratchers, doing what he must with intensity and passion.
A completely different worldview drives the third way of scratching - in fact, in many ways this is not really a scratch.
The Adjusting Shuffle is a hop-step-and-jump routine performed to make sure that the right thing is in the right place.
Alignment is key to the exponent of this craft and he is not satisfied till he gets it, so to speak, just so.
What is notable is that all these acts of self-contact are not gestures aimed at the outside world - these do not contain any overt sexual aggression.
They appear instead to be acts of narcissistic self-gratification; think of these as the adult version of sucking one's thumb.
Some psychologists argue that Indian men retain the sense of being the centre of the universe that a childhood of being doted upon fosters. The boy can do no wrong; he is rarely chastised and thus grows up believing in the legitimacy of his own impulses.
It also points to a larger comfort that we feel with our bodies - witness the ease with which we relieve ourselves of our various burdens in public. Or for that matter the nonchalance with which we explore various cavities in our body.
We spit, dig, burp and fart freely and frequently without feeling any great shame.
Perhaps this has to do with the fact that we see our bodies as an extension of the universe whereas the Western view of the body sees it as a source of shame.
Whatever the reasons, it is unlikely that this enthralling public spectacle is anywhere close to extinction. And if nothing else, it can certainly be said that the Indian man is in touch with himself. Frequently.
( The writer is the president of McCann Erickson, India )
I got this bit of humour from an Indian newspapar. Hope you enjoyed it.
So long as all this occurs in India, working an Indian job, I'm fine with it.
Hey this art is in danger of being endangered!
That was a great show
"We spit, dig, burp and fart freely and frequently without feeling any great shame."
The loudest burp I ever heard - Richter 6 - was not in India. Could they do it even stronger there?
There was an old lady fron Natchez
Whose clothes were all covered in patches
When comment arose
On the state of her clothes
She said "When ah itchez, ah scratchez."
Yeah, and you bathe in the filthy Ganges. Congratulations.
I
am
not
an
animal I am a human being.
BTW, some call it lice while others call it crabs when they scratch themselves silly. On the other hand, Dave Chappelle attributes the ritual of scratching to the effects to crack cocaine.
This is hilarious.....
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