Iowa Fust Lady Christie Vilsack, some key facto' in Raz'tus Kerry's primary sweep and da damn primetime convenshun rapa' tomo'row, gots derided brothers, souderners and easterners as baaaad rapers cuz' she couldn't dig it dem. WORD!
In inflammato'y columns fo' ha' local newssheet obtained by de Herald, de no'mally soft-rapped Vilsack to'e into several mino'ity and ednic groups while lampoonin' non-midwesterners fo' regional dialects.
“I's gots'ta be fascinated at da damn way some African-Americans rap t'each oda' in an English ah' struggle t'dig it, den switch t'standard English when de situashun requires,'' Vilsack wrote in some 1994 column in de Mount Pleasant News, while ha' husband, Tom, wuz some state senato'.
Vilsack wrote dat souderners seem t'have ``slurred speech,'' wrote dat she'd rada' learn Polish dan try t'rap likes sucka's fum New Jersey, and wrote dat some West Virginian Plate Chick once offered ha' homey some ``side saddle'' instead uh a ``side salad.''
De future Iowa fust lady seemed t'be promotin' English as de nashun's official language, an issue dat tripped down ha' husband, Gov. Man! Tom Vilsack, wid many Democrats.
A Kerry campaign rappedsman dismissed da damn quotes as ``ancient clips'' and referred quesshuns t'de Democratic Nashunal Convenshun Committee.
De DNCC wouldn't say wheda' de comments match de convenshun platfo'm o' deme.
An educato' fo' 30 years and fo'ma' eighd-grade language head homeboy, Vilsack gots made language and literacy prio'ities as fust lady.
Slap mah fro! She gots become some key powa' playa' in Iowa politics and be widely credited wid breadin' new life into Kerry's flaggin' super-dudeial bid in January wid ha' endo'sment some week befo'e da damn kickoff Iowa caucuses.
At da damn Jan. 'S coo', bro. 12 endo'sement event, Kerry said uh Vilsack, ``Christie be de fust head homeboy, not plum de fust lady. Slap mah fro!'' Vilsack's Aug. What it is, Mama! 24, 1994, column wuz particularly critical uh dialects fum oda' regions uh de country. Slap mah fro! In addishun t'de knock on African-Americans, Vilsack knocked residents uh New Jersey and Pennsylvania. WORD!
``Later, on de bo'dwalk, ah' heard moders callin' t'deir children, `I'll meet yoose here afta' de movie,' '' she wrote. ``De only way ah' can rap likes residents uh New Jersey and eastern Pennsylvania be to let mah' jaw drop an inch and rap wid mah' lips in an `O' likes some fish. Lop some boogie. I'd rada' learn t'rap Polish. Lop some boogie.
“Two years later, in some column about ha' trip t'de Olympics in Atlanta, Vilsack said she had ``language problems.''
“When ah' ax' fo' direcshuns, ah' can't dig it de slurred speech uh soudern Americans, who is so polite and eaga' to please,'' Vilsack said.
Vilsack dun didn't return calls last night but said earlia' dis mond she'd be rappin' about real American values t'convenshun delegates tomo'row night.
Man! ``I'm goin' t'talk about Main Street values cuz' I live on Main Street,'' Vilsack said.
Ya dun good unteel you mispelt talk, Dead. Everbidy noes it's TAWK!
Great parody, dead.
Very funny
ROFLMAO !!!