Well then, it's time to ban or heavily tax it then in order to protect the public from the demon bean.
Yes, we need a Caffeine Enforcement Agency.
BLAM BLAM BLAM (sounds of door being kicked in)
"You there! Drop the beans!" (sounds of weapons being cocked)
"Sergeant! Take some men and sledgehammers. Start bashing the sheetrock. I'm SURE they're hiding cappuccino in the walls! Rotten coffee-heads'll do anything... pushing their junk on schoolkids and nuns..."
"Sir! I found a bathtub espresso operation! We've got these bastards now!"
"Good. Call for trucks to haul their stuff off, and notify the banks to seize their accounts. We're gonna seize all their assets! What a beautiful day."