Posted on 07/01/2004 4:29:48 PM PDT by wagglebee
Appeasement groups are fighting mad: To honor the troops, the Minnesota Twins are giving G.I. Joe action figures to 5,000 children.
The baseball team plans to present Duke, "the calm and determined battlefield commander of the G.I. Joe team," at the game Monday night, the day after Independence Day, in what the Associated Press today called "the first patriotic giveaway in the major leagues this season."
Uh oh. If something is branded as patriotic, you know the whining will begin.
"It's not a credible way to honor those who've suffered the inhumanity of war," moaned Phil Steger, executive director of something called Friends for a Non-Violent World.
"I think the Twins are way off base with this idea. For gosh sakes, the last place we need to promote war is at our national pastime," grumbled John Varone of a group that dubs itself Veterans for Peace.
Another one of the anti-choice groups is called Women Against Military Madness.
The Twins have already partly caved by asking Hasbro Inc. to strip Duke of his customary tiny toy gun. "Hand grenades are still visible," AP advised.
Patrick Klinger, the Twins' vice president of marketing, said, "I know there are people who are adamant about opposition to the war, but this is not about politics."
The team also plans to offer half-price admission to military personnel and veterans and their families Monday. So far there are no reports of complaints about that, but the day is still young.
Heh. I believe these groups are merely a front for a much more sinister force. We all know who's really out to get G.I. Joe...Cobra!
No. there is no moutache or braided armpits..
"moustache"
saddam must be told 'No soup for you!"
They are having an "out of mind experience."
My idea? Simply purchase 5,000 of the same GI Joe dolla (or ask Hasbro for the guns they stripped from the action figures they're sending to the Twins), remove the nasty old plastic 1" guns from each plastic Duke doppelganger's deathgrip, package each gun along with appropriate literature, then give them away at the ballgame to every kid who got the stripped-down action figure. Advertise the package as a "GI Joe Completion Kit". Drive the limp-wrists crazy, all for the cost of a few toys and some sweat equity.
What do these people want, then? An action figure of Saddam Hussein complete with miniature but fully functional plastic shredder and electric cattle prod?
Never, but NEVER, have I heard ANY so-called "pacifist" denounce the REAL dictators of this world, past and present.
He'll fight for freedom wherever there's trouble. G. I. Joe is there!
G. I. Joe! (a real American hero) G. I. Joe is there!
It's G. I. Joe against Cobra the enemy**, fighting to save the day.
He never gives up; he's always there, fighting for freedom over land and air!
G. I. Joe! (a real American hero) G. I. Joe is there!
[Narrator: G. I. Joe is the code name for America's daring, highly trained special mission force.
Its purpose: to defend human freedom against Cobra, a ruthless terrorist organization determined to rule the world.]
He never gives up; he'll stay 'til the fight's won. G. I. Joe will dare.
G. I. Joe! (a real American hero) G. I. Joe!
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