Barney (not the purple dinosaur)
There is a guy named Barney, and one day he’s talking with one of his friends and he says “man I’m bored, I know everyone and have seen everything” His friend says “ come on, You don’t know everybody”
Barney says, “O.K. pick someone”
The friend says, “Paul Newman, You don’t know him”
Barney says “sure do, used to hang with him on the movie sets and at the races. Let’s go see him”
So they hop on a plane and fly to see Paul, catch a taxi from the airport and knock on the door at Paul’s house. The butler answers the door and Barney asks to see Paul. The butler says, “I’m sorry sir he’s having a private party and you must have an invitation” Barney says, “just tell him that it’s Barney”
“O.K. sir just a moment”, after a few minutes here comes the butler and let’s them in. Well of course Barney knows everybody else at the party too. After the party is over they get back to the airport and the friend says “not bad but you still don’t know everybody”
Barney says, “Pick somebody else” The friend says, “Pres. Reagan, you don’t know him”
Barney says “sure, no problem, we played golf for years” and they fly to D.C. and go to the White House. At the gate the guard stops them and Barney says “ we’re here to see the President” the guard says “Sorry Sir, but He’s in the middle of Mid-east peace talks and can’t be bothered right now” Barney says “just tell him it’s Barney” The guard says “wait here please”
And goes to the shack and gets on the phone. A few minutes later the guard answers the phone and then walks back out to the gate, opens it and waves them in. At the meeting Barney naturally knows everybody and solves the problem, has lunch and then they all leave.
The friend says “not bad but you still don’t know everybody”
Barney says “O.K. pick anybody in the whole world”
The friend says” The Pope, You don’t know the Pope”
Barney says “O.K. let’s go” and they hop on a plane and jet over to the Vatican, it’s fixing to be the Saturday Mass and Barney says “O.K. you stay here, I’m going to go inside and come out on the balcony and assist the Pope with Mass and I’ll meet you back here after Mass is over”
The friend says “O.K”
Off goes Barney and sure enough a little while later here comes Barney and the Pope and performs the Mass. After it’s over the friend is waiting for Barney and finally He shows back up and says, “Well now do you believe me?”
The friend says “well I wasn’t impressed until the guy next to me elbowed me in the ribs and asked me”…
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“Who’s the guy in the beanie next to Barney?”
Ohhhhhh that Barney. lol
I like my cowboy better. ;~)