How dare you criticize this grand labor union?(!) Why, we consistently keep a good 15% of our members employed. That's right, and it's for a whole six whole months too, not like those other sad-sack entertainment locals. Why, I should sick Melissa Gilbert on your ass! You don't want "Little House on the Prairie" to be doggin' you, believe me. I learned that life lesson the hard way.
I'd feel bad if it were a legitimate labor union, when in reality, it's closer to the communist party.