Epitaph and Epigone (Dowd alert)

The New York Times ^ | 06/10/04 | Maureen Dowd

[Pokey78]

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From Oxblog:

IMMUTABLE LAWS OF DOWD

1. Ashcroft never deserves credit.

2. Offering constructive solutions to problems, instead of whining endlessly about them, is a sign of weakness.

3. The People Magazine principle: all political phenomena can be explained with reference solely to caricatures of the personalities involved ("Dubya" is stupid; "Poppy" is an aristocrat; Cheney is macho-man; etc.). Any reference to the common good or even to old-fashioned politicking is, like, so passe.

4. It is much better to be cute than coherent.

5. Maureen knows best. Her long years as a columnist (doing basically what your great-aunt Tillie does in the nursing home bull sessions, but getting paid for it) have given her deep insight into foreign relations, politics, welfare, the Constitution, and all other topics. To disagree with Maureen in any way is not only a sign of being wrong, it's a hallmark of pure evil...or at least membership in the NRA, which is pretty much the same thing.

6. It is usually possible and always desirable to name-drop and name-call in the same sentence.

7. The particulars of my consumer-driven, shamefully self-involved life reveal universal truths.

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Explanation of the Dowd/Douglas connection: by Miss Marple- 2/11/03

Ms. Dowd was escorted around New York and DC for many months by one Michael Douglas of Hollywood fame and fortune. She got to go to all the best parties, was photographed for the tabloids, and was picking out a gown to wear at the Oscars. Of course, Michael had become interested in her during Clinton's impeachment, when she had written some very anti-Clinton columns. After a few weeks of the Michael treatment, she began to write anti-Starr, ant-Newt columns, ignoring Clinton.

Then Clinton was acquitted by the Senate. In an amazing coincidence, Michael Douglas dropped Ms. Dowd like a hot potato, and instead picked up a hot tomato, Catherin Zeta-Jones, who subsequently bore him a son and they were married.

Ms. Dowd cannot get over her tragic loss. Her columns are increasingly anti-Bush, in the hope of impressing her lost love, Michael.

In addition, we think she has a secret crush on the President and is trying to get him to pay attention to her. Ha!

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Moron Dowd enjoys a drink with her DemonRat Party pals
(Courtesy Free ThinkerNY)

[Paul Atreides]

W. was peeping out from behind the majestic Reagan mantle, trying to claim the Gipper as his true political father.

Unlike what the Dims have been trying to do with JFK, for the past forty years. /sarcasm

[stillnoprotestsagainstmuslims]

Maureen who?

[Congressman Billybob]

I am watching Jack the Ripper as I post on this thread. Seems somehow appropriate. Maureen Dowd is the intellectual equivalent of a South London skank, if ever there was one.

Did I miss anything?

Congressman Billybob

Latest column, "Memorial Day, 2004."

If you haven't already joined the anti-CFR effort, click here.

[Adrastus]

Anything I could say would be anti-climatic after the two above comments/posts.Dowd should give it up. She has been trashed by her own insecurities.

[counterpunch]

That final oicture of Dowd drinking with her legs over her head is obviously Photoshopped.
I do not believe she was wearing pants in the original picture.

[counterpunch]

This picture of Dowd drinking with her legs over her head is obviously Photoshopped.
I do not believe she was wearing pants in the original picture.

[lizma]

I haven't really read Dowd since her Elian screed but for some reason, maybe out of curiosity, thought I'd check her out tonight.

What a vindictive, base women. I really hope this women will never blessed us with her abilities to reproduce. She's justa gotta be filled with alot of spooky ovum.

Maybe she's a Rosemary wanna be. Clueless and vile don't mix.

[Consort]

Dowd: Epitome of Epicaricacy.

[lizma]

The before:

Viva la plastics.

[stillnoprotestsagainstmuslims]

LOL! I saw that the other day on that site awful plastic surgery..You ever see the one of Jocelyn Wildenstein? I almost puked my guts up when I saw that one. And I thought Michael Jackson went too far.

[Tamzee]

I believe it is Maureen Dowg...

[egarvue]

I actually am starting to welcome Dowd's rantings, becuase every time she gets her poisonous screed's published, I get a new round of Catherine Zeta-Jones pics! :-)

[Richard Axtell]

I usually try to point out how inexplicably blind columnists like Dowd think the way they do, and prove them wrong, but... like, who cares what she thinks? She is irrelevant.

[Starve The Beast]

Let's add it up:

• Sneer at the Masses for being emotional about Reagan's funeral: Check
• Accusation that Dubya is trying to exploit it: Check
• Lamentation that America has become an empire: Check
• Reference to WMDs: Check
• Reference to Abu Guraib: Check
• Vague insinuation that there was friction between Bush 41 and Reagan: Check
• Vague insinuation that Reagan wasn't really in charge, and that his people treated him like a dolt: Check
• Vague insinuation at catty relationship between Nancy and Barbara: Check
• Misrepresenting the war in Iraq as Bush bullying: Check
• Nebulous shot at "neocons", including mentioning the dreaded Paul Wolfowitz and the even more dreaded Richard Perle by name: Check
• Reminder that Reagan pulled out after the Beirut bombing: Check
• Calling Bush's stance on stem cell research "absurd and suffocating": Check
• Forgetting that she, just like every other loony lib in the media, treated Reagan with exactly the same bilious hatred that they now shower on Bush: Check

Maureen may not have an original thought in her head, but you've got to admit on thing: When it comes to parroting canned sound bites, she's a real trooper.

[suzyq5558]

Ive made it a point to ignore all things Dowd but this diatribe is sick. this woman is an ASS...

[mcenedo]

I actually am starting to welcome Dowd's rantings, becuase every time she gets her poisonous screed's published, I get a new round of Catherine Zeta-Jones pics! :-)

she's going to be on Leno in a few minutes

[mcenedo]

on now - looking good

[StAnDeliver]

"Just as Ronnie was a poor kid from Dixon, Ill., who reinvented himself as a brush-clearing cowboy of grand plans and simple tastes..."

Dear Maureen,

How does a "poor kid" "reinvent" himself? Are you saying that he's meant to be poor forever? That he should not reach above his station? This is troublesome and speaks to your truly small-minded point of view. Dixon was very rural in Reagan's youth and he learned to ride before he ever set foot in California. His enthusiasm for the rustic life was genuine. Note this excerpt from a written France Soir Magazine Q&A that Reagan responded to in 1984:

Q. What was your favorite book as a young man?

A. It was called "Northern Trails." I was quite young and impressionable when I read it, but it began for me a lifelong love of the outdoors. There was a magic world in those pages, and I was delighted to discover that such a world really does exist.

In closing, Maureen, please let me remind you once again that Michael Douglas married a goddess. In comparison, you look like a wart on a pickle. Regards,