Randi Rhodes
"It's disgusting looking back now at the friends you keep when you are addicted (when you are a news junkie). Brit Hume, Tony Snow, Bill O'Reilly... They are bad men. Very bad men. All they want is to get you into it. I call it "THE LIFE." They're dangerous. They distort your mind. They seem like they care about you getting the news, but really they just want their money and fix of Clinton...
Although... I am Glad that Laura Bush is in the White House... She believes that a child beginning at the very earliest age must be taught (how to respect the servants). What a great job she did with Jenna and the "other one". But by now I think the secret service must be used to those late night runs to the convenience store for beer, rolling papers, and condoms. Not to mention the boyfriend pick ups at the local county jail. But she tips well, though, as a liberal... I must observe that even when you are the progeny of a Patrician Dynasty there is certainly no excuse for not knowing how to hide your boozing...
GEORGE is a completely different matter. Did he really declare our Long National Nightmare of Peace and Prosperity is finally over? I thought I heard that. I MEAN here is a guy who thinks we should solve California's energy crisis by running an extension cord from Vegas. Guess Exxon's losing too much money on those free coffee refills. The only explanation we've gotten is that Clinton had no energy policy. Well then I guess the DRUNK MONKEYS that pick the daily oil prices have been in a bad mood since Bush came to town...
You now realize why it took his father, his father's friends, the Florida Secretary of State, and the Supreme Court to pull this off. His entire life gives a new meaning to the phrase "assisted living."