I can't say that they did 180-degree turns, but they clearly did better with me home more. They're both doing well in school, they're in the top math groupings and in the academic enrichment program. Our older son has ADHD, but he's a wonderful student and his teachers love him. Without a lot of structure and "a mean mom and dad" I think he'd be in worse shape. My husband and I are both deeply involved in volunteer work with the school and scouts, so we have some influence on their larger environment and know their classmates, friends, and school staff very well. We're not perfect parents, and there's no telling what damage was done by their early day care experience. Our older son is sometimes quite a handful, moody and lacking in social skills. Perhaps it's just his inherent personality. I always worry that I made life harder for him by not being there enough when he was little. I do my best to encourage young moms and dads to follow their hearts and tend to their own babies.
It seems to me that the pendulum is swinging back on this issue, at least a little bit. I sure hope so. Kids deserve better, and so do their parents.