Posted on 03/10/2004 7:40:40 AM PST by BenLurkin
LANCASTER - Pain and trauma were constant themes in Helen Carreon's life. In the end, it may have been the pain that killed her. The 30-year-old mother of six was found dead in her Lancaster home on Elm Avenue the morning of Feb. 28, the victim of what appears to be an accidental pain medication overdose.
The last two weeks of Carreon's life were a series of tragedies, beginning with a gunshot wound on Valentine's Day. The bullet, which pierced her leg, was allegedly fired by her jealous boyfriend, Byron Matheu, 25, a parolee and reputed gang member. Three days later authorities say Matheu murdered Carreon's neighbor in front of her children. Within days, Carreon was dead, too, a tragic ending to a life lived the hard way.
Nothing ever had come easy for Carreon. Kicked out of her mother's house at 12 after becoming pregnant, she had six children - all girls - by the time she was 22. She battled substance addiction, poverty, jail time and at least one abusive relationship. The father of her oldest children - ages 18, 14 and 13 - was murdered several years ago in Arizona. Her three youngest children, two 9-year-old twins and a 10-year-old, were living with their father in Riverside at the time of her death. Friends said she missed them terribly and hadn't seen them since Christmas.
Although toxicology results won't be back for several weeks from the coroner's office, Los Angeles County sheriff's investigators suspect medication to numb the pain may have ended her life. A ruling on the death will not be made until all tests are back, Coroner's spokesman David Campbell said.
Those who loved Carreon grieve her loss, while at the same time marveling at her resilience.
"Every time she got knocked down, she would just dust herself off and get back up," said Annette Banks, a close friend. "She was the heart of her family and the strength of her friends. I don't know how she did it."
Despite the problems in her life, Carreon was remembered as a happy person with a contagious laugh who went out of her way to help people, especially young teenagers. She loved to read and was known to take long baths. She couldn't wait to have grandchildren so she could spoil them, Banks said.
Her life was filled with struggles, some of them her own doing, loved ones acknowledge, and sometimes she turned to drugs when the pain overwhelmed her.
"But we loved her for who she was," Banks said.
As a single, struggling mother, Banks said, her friend longed for love and acceptance. She chose the wrong man in Matheu, and that proved to be her downfall, she said.
"It was a bad relationship," Los Angeles County sheriff's homicide detective Brian Steinwand said. "He was abusive to her."
Carreon and Matheu had been dating about 2 years, according to Carreon's oldest daughter, Kat.
"At first he was real nice to us, but then he started hitting my mom and we didn't like him no more," she said.
Matheu didn't live with the family, but he did stay there from time to time, Steinwand said. On Valentine's Day he was at the house when he and Carreon got into an argument and he accused her of cheating on him.
"He apparently pulls out a gun, and the gun goes off," Steinwand said. "She said he didn't mean to shoot her."
The bullet hit her in the leg, but Carreon took care of the wound herself. She told her children she had been playing with a gun and accidently shot herself, Kat said.
"She didn't tell us. If I had known, I would have gone after him with a baseball bat," she said.
Detectives learned of the shooting Feb. 17 while questioning Carreon about her neighbor's murder. They saw bandages on her leg and sent her to the hospital, Steinwand said.
On that day, Matheu was at the house looking for trouble, Steinwand said. He got into a fight with Arthur Morua, a neighbor and a close friend of the family.
"They started fighting, (Matheu) was losing the fight and he got one of his friends to get in there," Steinwand said. "Then, while his friend was kind of holding the guy, he gets up off the ground and shoots him in the head."
Kat and some of the other children witnessed the execution.
"Arthur was like an uncle to me," Kat said. "He always helped us out. He was just like my mom."
Kat and the others cooperated with detectives as witnesses.
"They're good kids," Steinwand said. "I feel for the kids."
Matheu is still at large, but detectives have two alleged accomplices, Richard Garcia, 24, and Rafael Espinoza, 25, in custody. News of their arrests within days of the murder was greeted happily by Carreon and her children, but another tragedy was coming.
The morning of Feb. 28, Carreon's 21-year-old sister Jodi entered Carreon's bedroom and found her lifeless body in her bed.
The family is now reeling with the sudden loss of two loved ones.
"I can't believe that we lost two great people two weeks apart," Kat said, adding that she doesn't know what the family will do next.
Money is tight, and the family doesn't have the funds for a funeral or even day-to-day expenses.
"People tell us to call if there's anything we need help with, so when we need food or help with something, I call them," she said.
Kat, who was not attending high school at the time of her mother's death, had plans of joining the Job Corps. Those plans are now on hold as she and her Aunt Jodi seek custody of her younger siblings.
A donation fund for funeral expenses and daily supplies for the children has been set up under Kat's full name, Kathleen Carreon, at Washington Mutual Bank.
In the meantime, Kat says she will use her mother's strength as an example in the trying times the family now faces.
"Even though my mom was young, she was very, very wise," Kat said. "My mom raised me so well, I think I'm stronger. We can't stop life; we have to continue for our mom."
Oh really? Let's see, in 1986 when she got pregnant, there already was Margaret Thatcher, Princess Diana, Phyllis Schafly, Betty Friedan, Jane Pauley, Barbara Walters, etc. etc. etc.
People like this woman and her family have no idea who those women are. You don't get it, and maybe you're lucky. They only learn from their insular environment, so these women don't exist to them. College doesn't exist for them. When you go from middle class existence into a neighborhood where you're the only white, English speaking family, you learn about the other side of the coin. We see things differently than they do. We have cultural differences going on here. I know about these parts of town. This is why I'm making a fuss about calling this woman names.
These folks are a different breed of cat. Aunt Jodi is 21, and the oldest is 18. Wanna bet they have the same daddy? I hate to speculate, but things like that go on in those cultures. Child gets abused, so it's her fault... Kick her butt out and protect the abuser. That's why I am so angry about people calling her names. Her life was misery, let's hope that she is with Jesus now, and He will watch over her kids.
I guess I just have a different perspective than you do.
Oh yes, the old liberal line "You're fortunate to be rich". Or as Dick Gephhardt said "Winning life's lottery". Puhleeze. It's called hard work, good decision making, and being responsible.
Bullshit! You are missing the whole point. This woman was abused as a child. 11-12 yrs old is a child in my book. It has nothing to do with the "politics of envy". My parents grew up during the depression, and I finally showed up after they had given up having children. My dad was 50 when I was born. They taught me the old time values, including compassion.
You mean the first two guys weren't losers? By this time her poor parenting excuse that you claim is no longer a valid excuse. And, in addition, father #2 must have good grounds to keep those 3 kids and not her. Like slutty behavior perhaps?
Lolololol! Of course they probably were losers. The first one was a felony child abuser, IF he was the father of the first one. Just what does a 12 yr old pregnant child do when she is kicked out of her house? You sure as hell won't go to the cops. You will find someone to take care of you. Living on the streets and getting into drugs etc, will certainly teach you discernment towards your partners.
Like I said, that may have been a valid excuse for children #1,2,3 but not for children 4,5,6.
You don't get it. In that culture, a woman alone is a bad place to be in. She has to have a man with her for safety reasons. He wants her pregnant, so should she abort her children? Fat chance that she even knew about birth control, and I'll bet if she suggested it her head would go through a wall.
You remind me of apologists for murderers who say that they shouldn't be executed because of a poor childhood and poor parenting.
She is not a murderer. Maybe I should ping the prolife crowd? She made unfortunate life choices, and it ended up killing her. I believe that normal human beings have a choice to refrain from killing someone out of anger or greed. If they can't handle their impulse controls, then it's not society's problem.
What we have here is failure to communicate.
Still, the best thing to do is walk away. FreeRepublic is a huge forum and there are other opportunities to express yourself for the greater good.
ping
She chose... poorly.
The saying about acorns and trees comes to mind.
The word for which you search is "loser."
The old-fashioned among us consider sex outside marriage a mark of sluthood.
The most remarkable picture I took was a closeup of a street gutter with an admixture of dead leaves, paper wrappers, silt and muddy water.
Nobody ever saw it for what it was.
Most thought it was an abstract autumn leaf-turning image; it always looked to me like a life wasted.
This thread was interesting and challenging for me personally. The story broke my heart, but it is so illustrative of so much that is wrong today in our society.
It came back to life with post #85.
I'm chagrined that I fell for yet another insider. Damn the luck!
Thank you. Your comments capture the tragic pathos quite well.
The taxpayers pay the freight for this idiot child and her 6 offspring.
It sounds cruel, but I'll say it: Mother's death is probably the best thing that could ever happen to her little girls.
phoenix thread...
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