| Gay Rites Could Elect Bush (Remember the Portland Four) Portland, Oregon -- Wednesday, March 04, 2004, four of the county commissioners, all females, stood before the cameras and said that when they discovered a law was unconstitutional, it was their job to fix it. This is what Oregon politicians actually think, and is proof that educationally-speaking, some chilluns have been left behind in this state. These four, deciding on their own that homosexual marriage is required by the constitution, raised the flood gates, and all hell broke loose in the Beaver State's largest city. MA, NY and SF are not going to outshine PDX;. Approaching the Superintendent of Education, a former public relations flack named Castillo, will be of little use, here. There is no evidence to indicate she knows how a constitutional republic operates. Besides, it's too late to reach those county commissioners. They're too old to learn anything true. Most conservatives hereabouts think these women need to be de-elected. Stripped of their badges of office. Yanked by a recall hook off the political stage. Waved by-by to from the back of mail trucks full of ballots adding them to the unemployoment lines. Chucked off the podium. Have their mikes unplugged. (Remove battery and device will cease making noise. Be sure to dispose of in an environmentally sensitive manner.) Some of us think that while the recall idea is a good one, there is another possibility, here. The loss of four liberal commissioners who will be replaced by four other liberal commissioners doesn't strike us here at the magazine as being a sufficient infliction of penalty. The Time should fit the Crime. County commissioners can call a law unconstitutional based on the advice from a private firm of local attorneys? Well, why not. That's just good old free speech.. But, when they take action based on that position which violates established legal premises as old as this nation? That sounds like we're getting into a dicey area. And, when they do it by fiat, without a public meeting, and without even a private meeting that includes all the duly elected commissioners? (One commissioner is a heterosexual male. His input would have been problematic. So, they just didn't tell him about the meeting.) That is what is know in literature as being beyond the pale. I kinda think were talking malfeasance here. Violation of statutory power limits. At the very least gross misdemeanors. This has national potential, folks. Remember the Portland Four. You say you don't know their names? It doesn't matter. Just remember that they are living proof that the liberal disregard for the rule of laws they don't like has seeped down to the very grassroots level of America. Four liberal dames in Portland, Oregon, decide that the problem with America is that marriage is limited to the bonding of a man and a woman. They further decide we need a basic family unit which is more flexible, and, since the legislature hasn't done it, they will do it for them. A Holy Trinity of commissioners, plus one. The Mother, the Daughter and the Holy Ghostess wave their hands and the Wedding March is replaced by In the Navy and YMCA.. (We'll call the fourth Lamont Cranston.) It is more efficient when you consider it. This approach lifts regulatory decrees over statutory law, and so bypasses the need for a legislature. Think of the savings. Certainly some of the greatest art and music in history came from Italian city states. Let's make Portland a medievil city state, too. Let's make Multnomah County Commission seats hereditary for women, Hispanics, Blacks and the Sexually Atypical. The title "Commissioner" must be changed to "Prince Person." Welfare representing bread, we could treat the urban population to circuses in the Rose Garden Arena -- throwing Rightwing Christians to the Mountain Lions -- and so at last have a public system of governance that matches the egos and leftwing fantasies of the urban intelligentsia. You aren't really thrilled with the idea? Well, then, perhaps you should do something about it. Something that will get their attention. Hit 'em where it hurts. If memory serves Bush lost Oregon by less than six thousand votes. Are there six thousand people in the eternally liberal Portland area whose seemingly endless reservoirs of tolerance for the terminally-silly progressives in this state have been finally drained? If there are, this is your moment in history. Say nothing to nobody. Cause no consternation in the community. Just go quietly on with your pleasant life mowiing your lawn and taking the kids to dance class. Don't tell a soul what you're going to do. And, then, this fall, pull the emergency cord and bring this liberal train to a stop. Vote for Bush. Give Oregon's electoral votes to G.W. The symbolic act. That's what will do it. Most of the people in Portland wouldn't know their own County Commissioners if they bumped into them on the street, anyway. There will likely be a recall attempt, and we enthusiastically support the move, but, as we pointed out above, if the past is prologue, four flaming liberals will be replaced by four more flaming liberals. That's just the way Portland is. Those of you in the suburbs (not in Multnomah County) have nothing to say about the matter. Directly, anyway. But, Oregon going to Bush? Nobody knows the names of their country commissioners, but everybody knows who Bush is, and what he stands for. It would cut them to the very liberal quick. Send a message to Portland. Smack 'em in the face with Bush. That's the ticket. This gay rites business is going to bring folks out of the woodwork all across America. Southern black Baptists who have had enough. Northern plains fundamentalists who have had enough. Why not six thousand overly-tolerant, overly-forgiving, overly-mild, Metro-area Oregonians who have had enough? Remember the Portland Four this fall. Send the urban poliical machine a message they will never forget. (LL) |