[Conspiracy Guy]

I conducted a poll yesterday and it came out Bush 100% Kerry -10%. I randomly called 10 friends and 20 familly members. I asked are you voting for Bush or that Commie Kerry? Then I sang this song before they could answer.


"The Little Old Commie from Massachusetts"

Sung to Jan and Dean’s Little Old Lady from Pasadena


It’s the Little Old Commie from Massachusetts.

The Little Old Commie form Massachusetts.
Go Kerry, Go Kerry, Go Kerry Go
He’s not worried bout his record cause he has two sets.
Go Kerry, Go Kerry, Go Kerry Go
He as slip’ry as grease up in DC town,
He will vote the bill up and then he’ll vote it back down.

Chorus:

And everybody’s saying that he offers the most threats.
That’s the Little Old Commie from Massachusetts.
He takes both sides, yes he takes both sides.
He’s the biggest dang liar up in DC Town.
He’s the Little Old Commie from Massachusetts.


It’s the Little Old Commie from Massachusetts.
If you hear him speakin out don’t pay attention.
Go Kerry, Go Kerry, Go Kerry Go
In a minute or so he’ll just change direction.
Go Kerry, Go Kerry, Go Kerry Go
The man aint trusted in either House.
Cause he always talks out both sides of his mouth.

Chorus:

And everybody’s saying that he offers the most threats.
That’s the Little Old Commie from Massachusetts.
He takes both sides, yes he takes both sides.
He’s the biggest dang liar up in DC Town.
He’s the Little Old Commie from Massachusetts.

Musical Interlude:

Go Kerry, Go Kerry, Go Kerry Go
Go Kerry, Go Kerry, Go Kerry Go
We need to send him home to his heiress wife.
Cause he’s got no business in public life.

Chorus:

And everybody’s saying that he offers the most threats.
That’s the Little Old Commie from Massachusetts.
He takes both sides, yes he takes both sides.
He’s the biggest dang liar up in DC Town.
He’s the Little Old Commie from Massachusetts.

Go Kerry, Go Kerry, Go Kerry Go
Go Kerry, Go Kerry, Go Kerry Go
Go Kerry, Go Kerry, Go Kerry Go
Go Kerry, Go Kerry, Go Kerry Go
Go Kerry, Go Kerry, Go Kerry Go
Go Kerry, Go Kerry, Go Kerry Go

Fade

Conspiracy Guy 2/24/04

This poll has no margin for error and is totally correct and scientific.

CG

[dirtboy]

"The Little Old Commie from Massachusetts"

Or perhaps "The Horse-Faced Commie from Massachussetts" - or maybe just the theme song from Mr. Ed.

[puroresu]

LOL!

There could be an entire CD set of Kerry's greatest oldies:

I Can't Get No Affirmative Action
Happy Abortion, Sweet Sixteen
Ballad Of The Red Berets
Kind Of In Drag
I Say A Little Humanist Manifesto
I Can't Stop Bussing You
Wake Up Little Brucie
J.F.K. Superstar
1-2-3 Red Light District
He Ain't Heavy, He's My Lover

And many more classic hits!