I'm sorry about your brother, and God bless him for his service.
However, you are not thinking logically about this. I am sure Ann Coulter would NOT say your brother "foolishly" stepped on a land mine.
Stepping on a land mine is not comparable to playing with a live hand grenade.
I love your brother. Do I know him? No but he made the supreme sacrifice and that warrants him being loved by his country.
He lost his life because he was in a combat zone. Had he been an RE and been playing with a mine, lost his leg then came home and called himself a hero, he'd be in the same category as Cleland.
Remember, Bob Dole didn't go around showing everyone the "hole" where his sholder used to be.