Love That Dare Not Squeak Its Name

nytimes.com ^ | February 7, 2004 | DINITIA SMITH

[Maria S]

"They exhibit what in penguin parlance is called "ecstatic behavior": that is, they entwine their necks, they vocalize to each other, they have sex."


So if “they have sex”, are we saying that these two penguins ACTUALLY penetrate each other anally (or however-the-heck two guys “do it”)? Answers, people…I need answers!!

P.S. This is THE screwiest article I’ve read in some time!

[Chris Talk]

You and me baby, aint nothing but Mammals,

So let's do just like they do on the Discovery Channel!

[NYCVirago]

Are those penguins named Pedro and Zim, by any chance?

[adam_az]

Gay groups argue that if homosexual behavior occurs in animals, it is natural, and therefore the rights of homosexuals should be protected. On the other hand, some conservative religious groups have condemned the same practices in the past, calling them "animalistic."

snip

Mr. Bagemihl is also wary of extrapolating. "In Nazi Germany, one very common interpretation of homosexuality was that it was animalistic behavior, subhuman," he said.

Why do I have the feeling that saying 'Conservatives are Nazis who see homosexuals as subhuman' was the entire purpose of this article?

Ironically, the propaganda techniques this author uses are straight from Goebbels.

[SoftballMominVA]

My male cat and female dog seem to have a "thing" going on lately. Should we start therapy? or just let them play out their sick, twisted desires?

Noooooo never mind, we'll just keep spraying them with water.

[sharktrager]

I don't know. I have lots of close friends and I don't have a desire to have children with any of them.

[fourdeuce82d]

STAN:
I want to be a woman. From now on, I want you all to call me 'Loretta'.
REG:
What?!
LORETTA:
It's my right as a man.
JUDITH:
Well, why do you want to be Loretta, Stan?
LORETTA: I want to have babies.
REG:
You want to have babies?!
LORETTA:
It's every man's right to have babies if he wants them.
REG:
But... you can't have babies.
LORETTA:
Don't you oppress me.
REG:
I'm not oppressing you, Stan. You haven't got a womb! Where's the foetus going to gestate?! You going to keep it in a box?!
LORETTA:
[crying]
JUDITH:
Here! I-- I've got an idea. Suppose you agree that he can't actually have babies, not having a womb, which is nobody's fault, not even the Romans', but that he can have the right to have babies.
FRANCIS:
Good idea, Judith. We shall fight the oppressors for your right to have babies, brother. Sister. Sorry.
REG:
What's the point?
FRANCIS:
What?
REG:
What's the point of fighting for his right to have babies when he can't have babies?!
FRANCIS:
It is symbolic of our struggle against oppression.
REG:
Symbolic of his struggle against reality.

[AfghanIraqVeteran]

Sorry 'bout that. I reposted this article.

[Van Jenerette]

"...gay penguins. When offered female companionship, they have adamantly refused it. And the females aren't interested in them, either..."

GAY MARRIAGE is a WEAPON of MASS DESTRUCTION
(for any society stupid enough to adopt it)

�

[John Beresford Tipton]

"Let's just hope the penguins don't start to politicize their sexuality!"

Too, late, they are already in their tuxes,
ready to go on the speaking circuit, just
DON'T encourage them by throwing them a fish!

[RightWingAtheist]

[gitmo]

Animals kill the babies of their rivals when resources become scarce.

Many first-time mothers in the wild frequently eat their young.

Males of many, if not most, species battle each other to obtain mates. They will attack the females if they show interest in another male.

Many animals lick their gonads in public.

The birds in this article were penguins. But many other species of birds push their juveniles off high ledges.

Dogs and cats will eat their own vomit.

Most people want to live better than beasts. Apparently some people don't.

[metesky]

We'll be inundated with like articles now.

[Lockbar]

This is what gay penguins look like on their off hours when the zoo is closed. They dress in drag and "let it all hang out".

[Mark]

The Widow Rancher

A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife. She was a very good looking woman, and determined to keep the
ranch, but knew very little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand.

Two men applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk. She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied,
she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house than the drunk. He proved to be a hard
worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching. For weeks, the two of them worked, and the ranch was
doing very well.



Then one day, the rancher's widow said to the hired hand, "You have done a really good job and the ranch looks great. You should
go into town and kick up your heels." The hired hand readily agreed and went into town one Saturday night.

However one o'clock came and he didn't return. Two o'clock and no hired hand. He returned around two-thirty and upon entering
the room, he found the rancher's widow sitting by the fireplace with a glass of wine waiting for him. She quietly called him over to her.

"Unbutton my blouse and take it off," she said. Trembling, he did as she directed.


"Now take off my boots." He did as she asked, ever so slowly. "Now take off my socks." He removed each gently and placed them
neatly by her boots. "Now take off my skirt." He slowly unbuttoned it, constantly watching her eyes in the firelight. Now take off my
bra." Again with trembling hands he did as he was told and dropped it to the floor. Now," she said, "take off my panties." By the light
of the fire, he slowly pulled them down and off.



Then she looked at him and said, "If you EVER wear my clothes into town again, I'll fire you on the spot ! "

[gitmo]

LOL

[thoughtomator]

Gee, you take animals out of their natural environment and put them in a cage, and then wonder why they exhibit deviant behavior?

[FormerlyAnotherLurker]

"The correct analogy would be that schools would be required to put feces on the school lunch menu."

IIRC - my school did.
Only they called it mystery meat. Smelled the same as ...

[Finalapproach29er]

Drudge is a penguin.

[varon]

Whether we like it or not, gay behavior DOES happen in nature.

Yeah, my dog use to like humping my leg but I didn't consider it natural ;-)