[netmilsmom]

I have had to give my children one spanking each in their lives. Now when I threaten to spank, they know what it is.
More than spanking, removal from the situation is most important. In otherwords, "If you can't behave like a human, you will not be with the humans." Even my three year old has had the "Go to your room" treatment. When she will not move, I remove her and hold the door closed while she bellows. It takes consistency more than anything else and children must know what a spank is to be able to hold it above them.

Please send the article to your daughter, do it for her children. They deserve a parent willing to put in an effort.

[annyokie]

Oh, funny story here: When I was finishing my BA, I was about 5 months gone with my last and I came downstairs to find my floppy disc (final project) covered with refrigerator magnets and my six year old looking proud. I started shreiking "Go to your room RIGHT NOW for your own safety!"

Fortunately, no harm was done to anyone or thing.

[Gabz]

It takes consistency more than anything else

EXACTLY!!!!

I admit I do slip now and then - but I do my darnedest to stick to the same rules all the time.

[Woahhs]

When she will not move, I remove her and hold the door closed while she bellows. It takes consistency more than anything else

You have got to be kidding me...

[luckystarmom]

I spanked one of my daughters twice, and it didn't work.

My son never needed to be spanked. You'd take away his action figures and he never misbehaved again. He's 9 now, and we're starting to get that adolescence attitude. We haven't decided how to handle it.

Then I have twins girls. One of them has special needs. She has brain damage and as a result she has had a terrible time with speech. She's 7 and still talks worse than most 3 year olds. The twins have been a challenge.

The one with brain damage is the one that I spanked. She use to get out of her carseat all the time. I tried everything to get her to stop including spanking her. Spanking made her scream and holler more. I finally just would pull over and wait for her to calm down, and then force her in her seat. It took years for her to stop.

She also had bad tantrums, especially when she was tired. I would try to run errands early, but she threw me some loops. One day we were picking up some lunch to go and she had a meltdown about wanting soda. I told her that she wasn't getting any, and she screamed and hollered so loudly. She was 4 or 5, and big and strong. I couldn't pick her up. I basically dragged her out of the store kicking and screaming. I had to lie her down and straddle her outside. She screamed for 30 minutes. Finally, I got her in the car. I was so embarrassed. I had people calling her a brat.

My other daughter has also had tantrums but not as bad as her sister.

The thing is after years of bad behavior, they are finally doing fairly well. I'm getting compliments about their good behavior. All 3 of them have never gotten into trouble at school. We were on a traveling after Christmas, and the plane was delayed an hour, then we had a 3 hour flight, an hour layover, and another hour flight home. All 3 of the kids were perfect. The other passengers commented about how nice my kids were.

They can still be a pain at home, and we haven't hit the teenage years. It also seems like if I'm calm about things they are better. Today, they missed the bus because they were slow. I was calm and just told them "Well, we're all going to bed 15 minutes earlier and getting up 15 minutes earlier. If you miss the bus again, then we'll go to bed earlier the next night." They just all said okay.

Kids (and parents) are very interesting. I'm pretty understanding when I see a misbehaving kid, especially if it is at a grocery store. I figure the mom probably doesn't want to take the kid, and the kid doesn't want to be there. I have a hard time with parents at a park ignoring bad behavior of their kids. I've seen some parents just let their kids throw sand or hit other kids.