Posted on 12/30/2003 8:05:07 PM PST by Indy Pendance
MONTREAL (AFP) - Americans all too blithely point to neighboring Canada as the source of their worst nightmares: the September 11 hijackers, the worst blackout in US history -- and now, mad cow disease.
Shocked by its first case of bovine spongiform encephalopathy, or BSE (news - web sites), and the subsequent banning of US beef by its main trading partners, the United States needed only four days to determine on Saturday that the infected cow "probably" came from the western Canadian province of Alberta.
Since Canada's only case of mad cow disease was discovered in the largely agricultural province in May, Canadian health authorities have warned their American counterparts not to reach any hasty conclusions.
"There is no evidence to confirm the cow originated from Canada," said Brian Evans, the Canadian Food Inspection Agency's chief veterinarian.
Canada took three months to trace its BSE outbreak to a single diseased cow, so now it is insisting that US suspicions be backed by DNA evidence and corroborated by an international team of experts.
But Canadians lately are getting used to being blamed for all of the evils that befall their southern neighbors.
In August, when a massive blackout struck the northeastern United States and parts of Canada, New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg and New York Governor George Pataki had no qualms about publicly stating that the trouble started in Canada.
For two days, the neighboring countries pointed fingers at one other until a joint investigation determined that the origin of the power outage was in the US state of Ohio.
But Canadians chafe even more at other US accusations.
Canadian officials have given up trying to counter the widespread belief among Americans that several of the September 11, 2001 terrorists entered their country from Canada.
An erroneous report published by leading US dailies a day after the tragic attacks helped conjure up images of Canada as a sort of "Club Med for terrorists," much to the irritation of Canadian authorities.
Tired of hearing New York Senator Hillary Clinton (news - web sites) criticize Canada, then-deputy prime minister John Manley, in a December 2001 meeting with her, demanded to know where she got information that neither he nor Canadian intelligence was privy to.
It would not be the last time the issue was raised.
A year ago, the US Federal Bureau of Investigation launched a dragnet for five presumed terrorists of Middle Eastern origin, insisting with a wealth of details that they had crossed into the United States from Canada.
But the FBI (news - web sites) eventually admitted that the mysterious suspects did not exist.
Hillary Clinton had again slammed Canada for its lax border controls, and Ottawa again demanded an apology.
And because the cost of living here is cheaper than in the United States, Canada is also accused of unfair competition by US pharmaceutical companies and Hollywood film industry unions.
Backed by several US state governments, the drug companies are currently pressing federal authorities in Washington to ban cheap medical products from being imported from Canada.
And the new governor of California, bodybuilder-turned-action-film-hero Arnold Schwarzenegger (news - web sites), has promised to stop US film studios from setting up shop in labor-cheap Canada.
Time's have changed
Our kids are kids are getting worse
They won't obey their parents
They just want to fart and curse!
Should we blame the government?
Or blame society?
Or should we blame the images on TV?
No, blame Canada
Blame Canada
With all their beady little eyes
And flappin heads so full of lies
Blame Canada
Blame Canada
We need to form a full assault
It's Canadas fault!
Don't blame me
For my son Stan
He saw the darn cartoon
And now he's off to join the Klan!
And my boy Eric once
Had my picture on his shelf
But now when I see him he tells me to **** myself!
Well, blame Canada
Blame Canada
It seems that everythings gone wrong
Since Canada came along
Blame Canada
Blame Canada
There not even a real country anyway
My son could've been a doctor or a lawyer it's true
Instead he burned up like a piggy on a barbecue
Should we blame the matches?
Should we blame the fire?
Or the doctors who allowed him to expire?
Heck no!
Blame Canada
Blame Canada
With all their hockey hubbabaloo
And that bitch Anne Murray too
Blame Canada
Shame on Canada
The smut we must stop
The trash we must smash
Laughter and fun
must all be undone
We must blame them and cause a fuss
Before someone thinks of blaming
uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
They devoted about 10 minutes to giving a forum and a very sympathetic interview to the head guy of the British Airline Pilot's Association, who was miffed that Tom Ridge wants foreign air carriers to be prepared to put armed sky marshalls on certain flights destined to land in the United States or overfly out territory. This brainiac thought that we were arrogant, and that we shouldn't undertake such a policy unilaterally; rather, we should work through the United Nations.
(steely)
So, if you Canadians wonder why we do not take you seriously, it is because apparently, you do not take YOURSELVES seriously. What could you do that would change this rep? Attack us militarily? (Yep, expect that one any minute). Form an alliance with OBL? (LOL, at least it would be a meaningful alliance with somebody). Put up a trade embargo with the US? (I actually had someone post here before that this would hurt the US more than Canada, which has an economy 1/10th our size and is more dependent on trade with us than we are with them).
Nope, you Canucks are not ready for prime time, tis a pity. Abrogate that independence treaty you signed with Britain in 1982; you are not yet mature enough to question the US on its behavior until you, at least to some degree, have perfected your own.....
That said, let's not forget about some of the finer things from our Northern Neighbors:
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