It didn't take long. Saddam's lice are now on sale on ebay...
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=10868&item=3645805355 Description
Notice how Saddam was deloused and shaved immediately following his capture by US forces? Wondering what happened to those lice? I'm not. My brother-in-law was point-man and physician's and barber's assistant for Operation Red Dawn. Saddam beard hair? As Coalition Provisional Authority Administrator Paul Bremer said this morning, "We got'em!" See my other auctions Saddam Authentic Spider Hole Beard Hair (black or white!) and Official Saddam Taxi Receipts!
We know what you're thinking: one louse looks like another. That's why every Official Saddam Louse is accompanied by a Iraqi Governing Coalition Saddam Louse Certificate of Authenticity!
All Saddam lice guaranteed delivered live and hungry, rarin' to go and jonesin' for some juicy dictator scalp!
Order 10,000 lice and receive free of charge a Limited Edition Operation Red Dawn Saddam Lice Magnifying Glass to better enjoy these lesser known members of Saddam's inner circle. Believe me, no one was closer to the big guy than these fellas!
Coming soon! While supplies last: Saddam Lice Nits... still attached to hair! They'll never surrender!!
Serious bidders only. Limit 1,000,000 lice per customer. Don't be fooled by lousy imitations!!!
(Disclaimer: This is parody and not a real auction - please do not bid. Auction will be terminated immediately upon receiving any bids. I have no lice, Baathist or otherwise.)
Here's how Saddam was really caught:
Stinky Bearded Homeless-looking Man: Kim-il, I'm telling you, I'll be okaaaayy. I'll be careful. Alright. goodbye. [ hangs up, as doorbell rings; cue "Jaws" music as he/it saunters over to the door ] Yes?
Voice of 4ID Soldier: It's Uday..
Stinky Bearded Man: Who?
Voice of 4ID Soldier: It's Baghdad Bob..
Stinky Bearded Man: What?!
Voice of 4ID Soldier: Telephone man!
Stinky Bearded Man: My telephone's okay! Who is this?!
Voice of 4ID Soldier: [ pause ] Your camel is double-parked, I think you're blocking me?
Stinky Bearded Man: I don't own a camel! come on, who is this?
Voice of 4ID Soldier: [ hesitant ] Candygram.
Stinky Bearded Man: [ excited ] A candygram! Oh, boy! [ opens door, and is grabbed and hustled out of his spider hole by 4ID Soldier] 