I can't speak for Freedox, but I think I might be able to stand the cold weather in your picturesque small town in the Northern hinterland for one winter, which I'm certain would be both wonderful and memorable.
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Incidentally, "mane", I looked up metrosexual and I TAKE IT BACK !!
To get an accurate definition, I had to look the word up myself. Now, get that head up and wipe those tears. You're forgiven, Sweetheart.
If I don't answer the doorbell, don't panic....
Just brush the snow off the bushes and look for me ! hahahahahhaha !!