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To: Non-Sequitur
Well, let's take it to court:

Judge Judy: Mr. Jackie Chiles, are you prepared to represent the soverign state of South Carolina?

Chiles: Yes M'am

Judge Judy: Mr. Lincoln, are you prepared to defend the Union of Northern States?

Lincoln: Maybe I am, and maybe I am not.

Judge Judy: Listen, we got enough of that BS at your inauguration. Speak clearly here, or leave.

Lincoln whispering to Seward: We are going to need some troops here. Call them up.

Judge Judy: OK, the Fort was ceded to the Union. The controlling legal authority for that action was the South Carolina legislature. Mr. Chiles, what do you have to say.

Mr. Chiles: The state ceded the property in compliance with the Navigation acts and the Federal plan for coastal protection. Who told them to occupy Sumter and turn the guns on the city? We didn't tell them. Who told them to do that? Where did they get that?

Calm down Mr Chiles. Mr. Lincoln, the controlling legal authorities were first the SC state legislature, then the federal law. If Union troop movements violates the federal law, what prohibits the state legislature from revoking the ceeded land. Remember that the location of the fort is on underwater shoals, and that the federal government has no right to interfere with the navigation of a state's river.

Lincoln: Well, maybe we can and maybe we cannot. (Whispers "Seward, call the General and arrest this woman")

Judge Judy: Mr. Lincoln, would you give this court a straight answer!

Lincoln: I believe that the current cognitive dissonance regarding the relative orientation of the named property is a function of the interaction of the original authority which ceased to exist recently and the omnipotence of the universal authority of the Union of the United States, and the fact that we have 75,000 troops.

(Hurry up and arrest her Seward, I can't keep this up for long!)

Judge Judy: You have no authority to arrest a duly appointed member of the judiciary.

Lincoln: Oh, yeah, watch me. Seward, don't forget those political opposers, oops, rebels in Baltimore.

Judge Judy (being carried off in irons): I rule that the moment that Maj. Anderson turned the cannon toward downtown Charleston, that that violated the federal acts allowing for the operation of the forts. Therefore, authority reverts to the legislature that is responsible for the ceeding of the property to the Union.

Lincoln: Turn her over to Sherman. He will be able to cause an attitude adjustment that suits us.

Judge Judy: Where's Jeraldo when I need him.
477 posted on 11/14/2003 4:34:56 PM PST by WarIsHellAintItYall
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To: WarIsHellAintItYall
Judge Judy...

Fairly appropriate choice for judge, given the contempt that the Davis regime had towards the idea of an independent judiciary.

481 posted on 11/15/2003 4:30:47 AM PST by Non-Sequitur
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