DFUSONG: Take Me Out to the Ballgame (Steve sings it)

DFU SONG PARODIES | 10-2003 | Lyrics, Doug from Upland

[doug from upland]

MIDI - TAKE ME OUT TO THE BALLGAME

Take me out to the Cubbies...I scored wonderful seats
If a foul ball should be coming near...I will grab me that great souvenir
'Cause these tickets cost a whole paycheck...I have a warning for you
No one had better get in my way...so watch out, Alou

[doug from upland]

Ping.

[4mycountry]

Sweet.

[Henchster]

He ain't gonna have no paycheck in Chi-Town no mo. If he don't get out before the union workers get their weekly newsletter, he's like, ah, toast ya know.

Seriously. With over 1 million crazed Cubbie fans, you just know that ONE of them figures they'll be the hero if they whack the foul-ball-guy. GET OUT OF TOWN NOW!

[COURAGE]

[Poohbah]

DFU, this guy rates a special edition "Weenie of the Week," to give us that old-time Freepin' ('cause it's good enough for me)

I wonder if this guy gets done in...will the jury hang, or will they have to have a change of venue to Springfield?

[doug from upland]

I have been tempted to re-start the WEENIE OF THE WEEK COLUMN, but I have so much on my plate that I don't think I have the time to devote to it.

[doug from upland]

I don't believe that cute girl is his girlfriend. Even if she was, she would be no longer.

[doug from upland]

Well, they thought it was not a good idea for him to show up at work the day after. I wonder if he is still on leave. What Chicago client would want to do business with him? He has an opportunity to set up shop in Miami. They love him there.

[Henchster]

OK, look at the way the fans are distancing themselves from the goofball "fan." It reminds me of the final scene in "Rising Sun" where all the executives stand back from the junior goofball who has been caught in the murder conspiracy. (Oh, I just had a flash, Bill & Hillary CAUGHT in ONE of their murder conspiracies.)

[Henchster]

He's done in Chi-town, that's for sure. I think your line in the other night's song about him joining the witness protection program is not only a good idea, I'd be surprised if he hasn't done so already!

[Poohbah]

Don't do it weekly; just do it in those weeks where we have a USDA Grade-A Prime Weenie to comment on (which isn't every week).

[BlessedBeGod]

Excellent!

[Sabertooth]

Funny stuff.

If any good can come of this, maybe certain people will stop wearing walkman's so much.

A pipedream, I know, but I'm going with it.