Posted on 03/18/2015 11:59:59 AM PDT by taxcontrol
Freepers, care to add to this?
Thanks for posting this. Ping to see what advice people have.
One suggestion, keep them in a separate fireproof safe and LEAVE THE KEY IN IT. My parents had all their papers in a small safe, and burglars broke in, couldn't open it, and took the whole safe. Later the police found it open in the local reservoir, all the papers ruined. Had the key been in it they would never have bothered to take it. It will also save your family from looking for the key.
My father passed in December and fortunately, he was well organized, methodical in his paperwork and planning, as well as keeping essential documents in a central, fireproof safe.
As an aside, he did keep a lot of unessential records along with the important papers. For example, we found all of his tax returns and tax receipts. . .dating back to 1954.
You might also include what you wish to be buried in. My father, a retired O-6, told my mother he wished to be buried in his uniform. He also told me that as well, too include pointing out his dress blues as the uniform he wanted. My mother, never confirmed which uniform and she had him dressed in his White Mess Dress with medals and rank. However, as pointed out, this was not the uniform he wanted to be buried in. That was one issue, not a big deal really, but my mother wanted to keep "his medals," and as the casket was closing she had them removed from his uniform, too include his shoulder boards with rank. He was basically buried without his military honors. Not what he wanted.
Might as well put them in a dresser drawer with a sign saying “Keep Out.”
That won’t help in a fire.
Sorry to hear about your father’s uniform. I believe that a simple fix could have been arraigned by having an extra set of medals. Perhaps one for the wife and each of the children?
Thanks for sharing your experience.
Well UT denizens?
Anything to add, suggest, or amend with this list?
Your suggestion would have worked. . .If I had known this was what she was going to do. But, sadly, I did not know mother was going to remove them until just before closing of the casket.
I offered to purchase an extra set and let him be buried with his honors but to my mother those were “his” medals and she didn't want to have a copy. She wanted his.
(These medals were your basic type, name not engraved, usual medals one gets when earning a Legion of Merit, MSM, Outstanding Unit. . that sort of stuff. However, mother was adamant and I could see any pushing on my part would have been very bad. . .and my last wishes are very clear on my uniform and medals requirements.)
I think that it is a great list. I particularly took to heart the advice about pets.
I am also very supportive of drafting a will, and other end of life documents. I would advise that everyone sit down and discuss the contents of the will with the heirs. If you are honest with them up front, it will likely eliminate the post death fighting that destroys families. Of course, this assumes that the heirs are mature enough to understand the discussion.
Bfl....I am working on something that solves this...will have to post it when completed
To be honest, this is a good list.
That is so sad. I am prior service myself and know how important that must have been to your dad. I can also empathize with your mom. Had you been given enough warning, you could have given your mom the medals prior to the funeral and had the new “shiny” medals buried with him.
Since I plan to live for a couple more millennia I’m not too worried about this.
Sadly, I did not know mother was going to remove them until just before closing of the casket.
I’ve thought about this a lot recently. My grandfather had a massive heart attack and dropped dead shoveling snow at age 44. My mother was 14 at the time, the oldest of 5 kids. He was a Liberator pilot in the Pacific during WWII survived being shot down twice, earning the Distinguished Flying Cross.
I just turned 44. I have 3 sons under 10. I’m also a military pilot and my health has been vigorously monitored over the years via annual flight physicals. That pesky family history still worries me. Enough so that as unpleasant as it was to do my wife and I have wills and complete estate planning done. Just necessary fault stuff to do.
Sorry for your loss.
Great thread. I am in the process of building a continuity book for my wife and sons for just this reason. I would also add to that list any routine household maintenance items that need tending to (air filters, water softeners, sprinkler systems, etc...), water mains, breaker panel, garage door openers... Don’t take it for granted that just because you know about these things that your family does or will remember to check. Also, vehicle info.
Oh that is good advice. My brother-in-law had just purchased his house and we are going to sell it so we dont really have a maintenance list. But I can see how this would be very helpful for the survivors, even if there was a need to sell the house.
I’m very sorry about your brother-in-law’s passing.
I will have all of my assets split evenly amoung my children. That is for the Will. The children get along very well together so it shouldn’t be a problem for individual items.
For bank accounts, I had to pick one of my children or any other adult to have control/ownership of the bank accounts passed to them when I pass away. The bank would not divide it any further.
Could you please let me know when you do...I am interested (in the list, not dying anytime soon). Thanks.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.