Busted a gut on this, thanks !!!
Posted on 05/07/2010 5:44:06 AM PDT by Lucky9teen
First Fifty! Woo-hoo!
LOL!
Great video clip.
Funny stuff, but, you know, it’d be interesting to hear from all the Mums who log onto this column what the REAL differences are/were in their treatment of their succeeding kids, and how those kids developed over time accordingly.
ping
Having downed a few power drinks, the woman turns and faces the man sitting beside her, looks him straight in the eye and says, "Listen here good looking, I screw anybody, anytime, anywhere, your place, my place, in the car, front door, back door, on the ground, standing up, sitting down, naked or with clothes on. It doesn't matter to me. I just love it."
Eyes now wide with interest, he responds, "No kidding. I'm a Congressman too. What state are you from?"
lol ping
"Just Wait Till Your Father Get's Home!"
In these days and times I could have had my mom arrested for mental torture.
Thanks for keeping the TOFST going. bump
Ahhhhhhh. Great moms and one idiot.
Got that in a good email from this AM.
Erma Bombeck quotes...
Do you know what you call those who use towels and never wash them, eat meals and never do the dishes, sit in rooms they never clean, and are entertained till they drop? If you have just answered, “A house guest,” you’re wrong because I have just described my kids.
In general my children refuse to eat anything that hasn’t danced in television.
My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car.
Youngsters of the age of two and three are endowed with extraordinary strength. They can lift a dog twice their own weight and dump him into the bathtub.
Thanks for posting this thread every week. I look forward to reading it.
Thanks Lucky!!
I never get tired of that clip, thanks!
More Things My Mother Taught Me...
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
“If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.”
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
“You better pray that will come out of the carpet.”
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
“If you don’t straighten up, I’m going to knock you into the middle of next week!”
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
“Because I said so, that’s why.”
5. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
“Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you’re in an accident.”
6. My mother taught me IRONY.
“Keep crying, and I’ll give you something to cry about.”
7. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
“Shut your mouth and eat your supper.”
8. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
“Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!”
9. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
“You’ll sit there until all that spinach is gone.”
10. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
“This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.”
11. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
“If I told you once, I’ve told you a million times. Don’t exaggerate!”
12. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
“I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.”
13. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
“Stop acting like your father!”
14. My mother taught me about ENVY.
“There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don’t have wonderful parents like you do.”
19. My mother taught me ESP.
“Put your sweater on; don’t you think I know when you are cold?”
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