Posted on 01/26/2007 1:58:55 AM PST by sully777
Oh my goodness! Are those new shoes??
Geez, she needs gas-x!
I have one of those!!
Gimme a pin!
bad for the ozone.
Reminds me of a story an old fleet sailor told me years ago.
These two wive's went to the pier to meet an incoming carrier. One of the women carried a big sign that had EF in big block letters printed on it.
Lining the rail, her husband carried a similar sign that had FF printed on it.
The second woman asked the other, "what's with the signs?". The first woman said "EF means Eat First!"
What shoes?
As my ship was pulling in once, and we were manning the rail, I heard a guy remark, "Look at that hog in the miniskirt!" After he picked himself off the deck that he had been knocked down onto, he realized that he was talking about someone's wife.
"I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy."
Tom Clancy
"You know "that look" women get when they want sex? Me neither."
Steve Martin
"Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand."
Woody Allen
"Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night."
Rodney Dangerfield
"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 500SL."
Lynn Lavner
"Leaving sex to the feminists is like letting your dog vacation at the taxidermist."
Matt Barry
"Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope."
George Burns
"Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation. The other eight are unimportant."
George Burns
"Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole relationships."
Sharon Stone
"My girlfriend always laughs during sex --- no matter what she's reading."
Steve Jobs
(Founder, Apple Computers)
My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch."
Jack Nicholson
"Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet."
Robin Williams
"Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month that I can be myself."
Roseanne
"Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place."
Billy Crystal
"According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course, men are just grateful."
Robert De Niro
"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms.
They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?"
Dustin Hoffman
"There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men think, I know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody naked."
Jerry Seinfeld
"Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house."
Rod Stewart
"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time."
Robin Williams
Which is realy helpful when searching for images!
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