I encourage the effort every time I can.
I had a cousin who was very sensitive about her weight, so during a visit when I thought she'd lost a lot of weight, I didn't say anything.
Seems I was the one person she WANTED to get feedback from.
She quit trying, soon after, and I've always felt guilty, even if it seems crazy or egotistical to think I could have made a difference.
We lost her in her 50's.
“She quit trying, soon after, and I’ve always felt guilty, even if it seems crazy or egotistical to think I could have made a difference.”
Something that I always tell my kids (and others beating themselves up over something) is that you cannot change history, you can only learn from it. You are not at fault for what your cousin - an adult of normal intelligence - did or did not do. That you feel guilty is simply a reflection of your essential decency - that you feel responsible to and for others.