Posted on 04/04/2017 2:48:08 PM PDT by FamiliarFace
Thank you. I believe in the power of prayer. I know we will figure this out, and every prayer will help us.
I lost my Dad first then Mom in 2007. We were 200 miles apart. I got there when she was in emergency and passed there. How I wish I could have spent those last months with her. If you are able to take leave from a job or make any arrangements maybe you can move there for the end. Don’t have any regrets. God Bless!
https://www.archives.gov/st-louis/military-personnel/public
My husband suggested this link. Good luck!
I was just going through some old threads and wondered how your mom is doing and how you did with your info. Posting what happened may help someone else, too. :) Have a blessed Memorial Day. My monitor has been blurry most of the time today.
Great timing on your part, and thank you for asking. I was just back home last week and was able to see a VA service officer who helped me with the application for “intent to file” for Mom. I went without an appointment , and it was first come, first served. It didn’t take as long as I thought it would, perhaps a half hour waiting on the front end, with an hour to go over the forms. When I went in, he asked if I had a copy of Dad’s DD214 and I told him no, that the original was misplaced, and that people in St. Louis told me that his records were burned in the fire. So he asked to see what I did have and I showed him my copy of Dad’s wallet sized form that showed his entry and exit dates. He said that was good enough.
He told me Dad should be qualified to receive some sort of help, and because of that, Mom might be qualified, too. So he took Dad’s info and gave us forms to fill out. I took them back to the house and got Mom to sign them, which he said was the biggest thing. I took them back to him that afternoon. I had to wit my turn again, and that wait was longer, probably about an hour, but my second visit was shorter, maybe 20 or 30 minutes. Even though I spent several hours there that day, the man was very nice and very helpful. So we have at least started the process, and I guess we’ll have to wait and see how long this all takes from here.
One thing the service officer said that interested me was when he asked me if Dad had ever received benefits before, and I told him no, that I don’t think my dad ever thought he was worthy of anything. He said to me right then, “That’s why we call them the greatest generation! They came and willingly served their country, and when they were discharged, they went back to their lives and never asked for anything in return!” I nearly choked up when he said that. Still makes me tear a little, because I know how true that is. Both my father and father in law served during wars, and neither of them ever looked for any help from the government when they left. They just went on like he had said.
Mom declines more with each week that passes. I go back to help for a week every few weeks. It would be nice if I were closer, but flying for a few hours is as good as I can manage for now. I know my sister and brother really appreciate the help and the break. Mom doesn’t really know who I am anymore. She marvels that I know so much about her and her home and her family. This time she remarked that she figured I was just finding out now who my family is. It’s the only way her brain is processing the information. It used to hurt. Now I understand that it is the disease of dementia. When she has brief moments of clarity, it is nice to see my mom reappear. I treasure those moments. They are true gifts.
I am helping a woman with the beginning of dementia which started after breaking her hip 2 yrs ago but she is 92. It also runs in my family. Neuroscience is making great strides these days so I take my moments of forgetting words, keep up with the newest studies, and hope I begin to exercise TOMORROW, if I remember. LOL
As for the Greatest Generation, there are still some with the same attitude, but they really do need to go get the help when their families need it. Your post will destress anyone who may be afraid of the system. Will add you and your family, especially mom, to my prayer list.
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