I agree. Better strategy is to focus on things which will do long-term damage to the Left, like getting a conservative on the Supreme Court, rather than things which will further mobilize the Left's base against us. It's best, right now, to focus on those things which will damage the Left's elites, while not exciting their troops.
That is how I see this battle. President Trump cannot issue an executive order that will stop all gay activity in the country. What he can do is peripheral - important symbolically but not substantively. It is better to get 2-4 conservative Justices in place, hundreds of conservative federal judges who believe in the rule of law, and a smaller footprint for government as a whole. That weakening of the Left and their source of power will allow us to win on the social issues later, perhaps two years from now or even in the first year of his next term. We lose out on some quick, feel-good wins, but we get more and bigger wins in the long run. I hope.
I am not okay with cutting government "later" as the republicans have always promised. I am more than okay with fighting the necessary battles in the right order, and no one could claim that President Trump is not already fighting and winning several of the battles that we elected him to fight.