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To: OddLane
Rules for Coding:

1. Be born in India or China
2. Obtain questionable degree in computer science at unaccredited university in your home country
3. Obtain H-1b visa
4. Make manager write down software requirements
5. Blindly follow requirements
6. Do not ask questions. That could be viewed as insubordination.
7. If a requirement is ambiguous make the safest guess possible as to what it means. The guess that results in the least amount of code.
8. If two requirements seem contradictory, follow both if possible, or choose the one that results in the least amount of coding.
9. If the code you generate doesn't work the way the manager wanted plead with him that you followed the requirements to the T so it can't be your fault.
10. Hand off code to one of the few remaining US coders to fix any mistakes.

2 posted on 03/05/2016 12:04:05 PM PST by who_would_fardels_bear
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To: who_would_fardels_bear

Coding in many compilable languages is relatively easy. The secret I found when learning is to take things you know and then write code to perform on a computer. I learned way back in the days of Fortran and Cobol.


4 posted on 03/05/2016 12:10:38 PM PST by UB355 (Slower traffic keep right)
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To: who_would_fardels_bear

11. You are not paid to write comments or document anything.


12 posted on 03/05/2016 12:21:18 PM PST by central_va (I won't be reconstructed and I do not give a damn.)
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To: who_would_fardels_bear

Actually item 10 should read hand off the consultant brought in to fix project


32 posted on 03/05/2016 12:58:28 PM PST by Nifster (I see puppy dogs in the clouds)
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To: who_would_fardels_bear

13. Let testers debug your code. When you fix the problem you will look like a hero. Heck put bugs in there on purpose. Never submit perfect code. Ever.


36 posted on 03/05/2016 1:04:26 PM PST by central_va (I won't be reconstructed and I do not give a damn.)
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