Curiously, my weapon never loaded itself, never left the table, and never committed acts of violence.
So I sent the following letter:
Dear Mayor James,My firearm does not seem to be committing acts of violence. I think it is defective. Would you please issue some funds so I can replace it with a more violent gun?Hugs and kisses,
Laz
No that there’s just plain funny.
My handguns are locked up in my safe.
Good thing, too. I hear constant pounding noises from the inside & muffled cries of “Let us out!!”
But when I throw open the safe door, they’re just all lying quietly on the shelves, not making a peep.
Devious little b@stards, those handguns are......
Somewhere on the Internet, there’s a webcam that a guy has set up showing his gun 24/7. So far, it hasn’t even moved at all. I guess it’s another one of those defective guns.
You mean you never saw your firearm levitate all by itself? You would have heard it when it made a noise sounding like some cheesy 1950’s science fiction movie!